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I shot a hot dog because of these sweet abs
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Youni19 · 26-30, F
I tripped over a hot dog because a clown stole my taco... I luv this
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@Youni19 sounds like a good time at the fair
SW-User
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User Sweet dogs
SweetMae · 70-79, F
I wanted my professor because of these sweet abs.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SweetMae 😂😂 Lucky professor..lol
SW-User
Well...luckily this thing is pure fantasy...🤤
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User hmm,would love to see your results.
SW-User
@bhatjc Lol. ..no, they are awful. .....
bhatjc · 46-50, M
@SW-User you can tell me in pm ;)
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
I tripped over Trojan Man because my boobs are amazing
JRVanguard · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion Of course
SW-User
@PerfectIllusion Aeris @JRVanguard B.B. Aeris.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@JRVanguard Yes! I can't wait!
Degbeme · 70-79, M
I tripped over a hot dog because I had one too many drinks. 🙄
Degbeme · 70-79, M
@AlienZipper Freud would throw in the towel after a lot of the stuff on here. 😏 Probably go into botany. :p
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@Degbeme Probably burn his couch 😁
@Degbeme LOL..So true!!
I tripped over a bowl of cereal because I needed to pee... actually this isn't too far from the truth. lmao
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@sunnydreams That's taking "organic" to a whole new - and somewhat disturbing - level 😁😂
@AlienZipper Hahahaha Yup;)
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@sunnydreams You silly girl, lol...
SW-User
I licked Trojan man because I love bacon 😩
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User ewww..lol
Nat15 · F
I licked a glass of vodka because I love bacon!
Nat15 · F
@PerfectIllusion Strap me down and read Of Mice and Men to me ;) lol
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Nat15 oh gawd! I'll let you drink vodka and eat bacon instead! 😊
Nat15 · F
@PerfectIllusion Hehe Thank you!!! 🥓🍸
I licked an Easter egg because my cat is an asshole🐱
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Mondayschild Haha.. I just busted out laughing! 😂😂
@PerfectIllusion these are funny😂
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Mondayschild I love them. It doesn't take much to amuse me apparently..lol
TimSummers · M
I made out with Channing Tatum because a clone stole my taco and the voices in my head said so
TimSummers · M
@SW-User You are just jealous! HAHA!!!
SW-User
@TimSummers totally! He's hot!
TimSummers · M
@SW-User I agree!
Noreaster · F
I made out with a bowl of cereal because I'm awesome in bed. Ok!
SW-User
I beat my best friend because the voices in my head said so.
SW-User
@Elandra77 he likes it 😂
@SW-User Dang!! Then keep listening to those voices.
SW-User
@Elandra77 I do hahaa!
I wrestled an easter egg because a clown stole my taco 😰
@UndeadPrivateer NOOOOOO!!!!!
UndeadPrivateer · 31-35, M
@Dewms Way of the Mango Master it is. 😌
@UndeadPrivateer much better!!!!
SW-User
I cuddled with Burt Reynolds because the voices in my head said so
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User sorry buddy! 😛
SW-User
@PerfectIllusion haha I love these stupid things :)
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User me too. They make me laugh!
Elysian · F
I tripped over a stripper bc im awesome in bed. (True) lol
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Elysian lol..sounds believable!
Elysian · F
@PerfectIllusion 🍒🍒
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Elysian 😉
swl2jo · 56-60, M
and happy bday this week
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@swl2jo Thanks so much! 😊
I licked Cookie Monster because I'm sexy as fuck. Which is only partially true.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Stark mmhhhmmm... yea, yea
SW-User
@Stark totally true.
@SW-User 😊
Noble · 56-60, M
I beat a volleyball because I like be bacon.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Noble uh huh.. I have a halo too. See.. 😇
Noble · 56-60, M
We’re just a couple of angels 😇😇@PerfectIllusion
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Noble Probably shouldn't stand too close to one another, our horns will become entangled.. halo, I mean our halos!
fun4us2b · M
No shirt! 😱
fun4us2b · M
@PerfectIllusion I thought maybe you lost it in a card game! Sounds like you're having fun under there
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@fun4us2b nah.. I always play my cards right! 🃏😉
fun4us2b · M
@PerfectIllusion As good as you are, when you least expect it you can lose your shirt...👚
Icarus16 · 51-55, M
I ate a landmine because of these sweet abs
@Icarus16 You are setting metal detectors off.
Icarus16 · 51-55, M
@Elandra77 I thought it was because of my Magnetic personality!!
Corwinnx · 56-60, M
LOL...I made out with a stripper because Freud told me to.
Socialclutz · 36-40, M
I made out with a teletubby because I love bacon
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Socialclutz It's Tinky Winky I just know it!
Socialclutz · 36-40, M
😂 🤣 hows you guess? 🤣
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Socialclutz I'm kinda smart like that! 🤓
waterman1005 · 56-60, M
I wanted a glass of vodka because the voices in my head said so!
akindheart · 61-69, F
omg. i tripped over a stripper because i am sexy as f***. funny
sciguy18 · M
I tickled the toilet because the voices in my head said so...
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@sciguy18 eww.. you better get some help or some antibiotics! 😂😂
Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
I got naked with the Trojan man because of these sweet abs.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Fungirlmmm lol.. it happens! 😊
Fungirlmmm · 51-55, F
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
I made out with a candied yam because the voices in my head said so.
Mmiker · 46-50, M
Happy belated birthday
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
I made out with an Easter egg because I love bacon....

Well that explains my breakfast fetish...hmmmm...
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@AlienZipper I could say so much.. lol
AlienZipper · 61-69, M
@PerfectIllusion Aahh...go ahead and say it, lol...
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
I ate a hotdog because of these sweet abs
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion well I like that philosophy haha, no baggy t-shirts for you then?
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@AlphaPuppy I don't know why I read that completely backwards! I think it's time for bed..for real..lol
AlphaPuppy · 26-30, M
@PerfectIllusion aww ok, well sweet dreams
SW-User
I made out with a candied yam because I am PURE CLASS.
Tryingtofindabalance · 36-40, M
I made out with a tooth brush because of these sweet abs
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
Tryingtofindabalance · 36-40, M
@PerfectIllusion looking in the mirror in the morning, how can one resist?
SW-User
I ate a cookie monster because I'm awesome in bed🤣
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User 😂😂 I don't know whether to say I'm sorry or congratulations. Lol
SW-User
I'm surprissed😯
lol
waterman1005 · 56-60, M
I wanted a glass of vodka because of these sweet abs
I licked a purple Easter egg because I needed to pee😄
@Mondayschild A lot have that issue. lol
bhatjc · 46-50, M
I ate a porn star because the voices in my little head said so
Luvbuttz · M
@bhatjc so u licked the TV screen?
bhatjc · 46-50, M
Magenta · F
I tickled Aristotle because my boobs are amazing. 😊 😄
Magenta · F
@Elandra77 Indeed...My feminine wiles turned his mind to mush. Haha!
Some1Else · M
@Magenta

THEY ARE!
THANKS For sharing!
I'll UPS them back tomorrow!
SW-User
I’ll try and remember your birthday 😉. Maybe get a wee tickle too 😈 @Magenta
Ccrider63 · 70-79, M
I ate a porn star because I love bacon.
Some1Else · M
Joker · 41-45, M
I made out with a teletuby because I needed to pee. Btw perfectillusion... your a tease!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Joker uh huh.. good excuse! Just keepin it real because I don't..lol
Joker · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion that’s flippin sexy! Like I said... tease🌹💋
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@Joker hehehe.. 😇
goagainsttheflow · 31-35, F
I cuddled with the toilet because a clown stole my taco!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@goagainsttheflow eww.. I can't even imagine. I hope you were drunk!
SW-User
I wrestled a mop because I’m sexy as fuck.. LOL
SW-User
Lucky mop 😛. @SW-User
SW-User
@SW-User LOL!!! 😊
SW-User
Can I be your mop some times 😈. Lol @SW-User
IndyJim · 51-55, M
I licked some mayonnaise because the voices in my head said so
SW-User
I licked a bowl of French fries because my boobs are AMAZING😂
@SW-User good reason!! Lmao!!
wyolatex · 41-45, M
I licked a candied yam because the voices in my head said so!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@wyolatex oh yuck!
wyolatex · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion Tell me about it!
SW-User
I wrestled the toilet because I needed to pee.
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@SW-User Did you really have to cause such a scene? Why didn't you just pee? 🙄
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
Lol i got naked with a porn star because I love bacon
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
@PerfectIllusion can two guys be naked together and eat bacon without it being gay?
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@WeighedDown Hmm.. 🤔 Depends on if you share your meat. 😂
WeighedDown · 41-45, M
TryingSW45 · 51-55, M
"because I licked the toad"... That does not put me in a happy place
Stop killing dogs please :(
newgirl · 56-60, F
I licked a golfball because my boobs are amazing!
PerfectIllusion · 46-50, F
@newgirl 😂😂

 
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