Inside the Moment that Never Ended

there is a before
that keeps flickering
like a light
once warm with life

and then
there is after
where the light
no longer stays on
where the heat ran out

I remember everything
even the parts
my mind tries to blur

a red alarm
blaring inside me
while I stayed trapped
inside my own skin

I learned what it is
to be present
and absent
at the same time

now there are places in me
that flinch without warning

a nervous system
that never stopped reacting
as if danger learned my name
and decided to stay

and I don’t know how to explain
that some parts of me
are still living
in a moment
that never ended