its me again

Its me again, been a whole year since i last posted here. and i came back to voice about, another problem. I've recently come to realization that i might be showing traits/symptoms of possible ADHD and BPD ( borderline personality disorder). and it has been heavily affecting my relantionships with the people around me. i constantly hurt myself and them because of my actions. obviously i cant blame this all on my possible mental issues, i feel frustrated about the fact i can't voice out my problems to people who i can trust but instead talk about it here where i feel the most safe. i wish it was easier for me to just say im not okay to my loved ones, yknow?