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I Believe Everything Happens For a Reason

Such is life

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PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
Sounds like a good image of how the world tends to be and have been for the longest time.

No matter what you do, there will always be someone who takes issue with you or your actions. Pleasing one person upsets the next. While one might be able to find a ground that resonates with a larger portion of a group, there is no such thing as pleasing everyone.

Not only that, but there will always be people who judge even without knowing or understanding your situation. They will judge without asking why things are like they are, why you have made the choices you have, and without even trying to see where you come from.

Even now I see it in certain online groups and cultures, where some people are hounded into apologizing for something they aren't always guilty of. When the pressure reaches critical mass, some do apologize even though they don't really owe an apology, solely to please and get people of their back. And then the very people who demanded the apology turn to harassing because the person apologized, how that means they are guilty of every bad thing under the sun, that the very act of apologizing is an insult to them, etc.

Again, yet another situation where no matter what is done, it will be turned against you.

At the end of the day, I suppose all we can do is - rather than try to appease everyone - to try to accept ourselves, align ourselves with our goals and values, be open and understanding as best we can and focus on the people who do matter to us in life.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet Thank you very much....I have A lot to learn
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife I think we all do. But you are out here, asking tough questions, you're willing to face them, and even if you might not always agree with every single point that is presented (and rightly so I suppose) you seem to approach them with an open mind and with genuine interest in trying to understand them. I respect that, and I think that shows you're on a good path.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet He who increases knowledge, increases sorrow, what do you think of this statement ?
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife I think it is "sort of true". Knowledge itself won't intrinsically increase sorrow, but it opens the way to seeing things - not just good, but equally the bad - that would otherwise be behind a veil to us. The sorrow then comes from how we approach these bad things:

Do we let them get to us? Do we accept them as an unavoidable part of life? Do we see them as personal flaws? Do we accept them or do we fight back? Does it make us feel powerless, or do we see it as serving a purpose?

How we answer them to ourselves could mean the difference between sadness and bliss, whereas without knowledge we might not be forced to face these questions.

May I ask what your own take on the statement is?
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet Thank you so much for seeing the best in me! I think I am on good path as well and i understand more and more everyday. I am grateful..Your encouragement is uplifting experience. I am here to learn and very grateful that you see that:)
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife You are most welcome! Although I can't take credit for you being you, remember to thank yourself as well. ☺️ I am glad you feel that way, and yet again, I hold a lot of respect for that.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet Thru knowledge I have understanding that end result of life here as we know it is death in THIS life.
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife Does that make you feel sorrow, or does it inspire peace within you?

No judgement, just pure curiosity on my end, does that mean you do not believe in afterlife of any kind?
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet Sorry i meant life in THIS life. I believe in afterlife very much so and that's where the sorrow comes in I guess. Yes it does give me peace but also sorrow.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet Maybe i will try and explain it again more knowledge i get sad get because certain amount of people are being blind to see that after death they won't be any second chances to do it over and I get sad because i see that not everyone is going to make it into heaven, that the Spirit of God will not strive with a man/woman forever in trying to get him/her saved. As a result, a certain percentage of human race is going to end up in the worst and most horrible place imaginable. Life is not a rehearsal.
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife Ahh, I see. I didn't realize you were religious in that sense (but let me be clear that I don't consider that a bad thing at all... no judgement, I just wasn't aware). Yeah, can see how that gives both peace and sorrow. The fact that you feel sorrow for those who will not achieve that shows that you have a good heart.

No matter what system of belief we hold sacred in this world, whether we believe in an afterlife or nothingness at the end of this life, I think a lot of us will agree that indeed life is not a rehearsal. We should value it, treat our life and others with proper respect.
suchaslife · F
Aww sorry, yes i am religious and when I made this post is when I realised the big picture and why things are the way they are.
I see now that everyone is being tested in this life
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife Nothing to be sorry about at all. I was just a bit surprised as it simply hadn't struck me before, but again, I don't think that is a bad thing. To me it doesn't matter what religious belief one has (or lack thereof). I will think no less of a person so long as one is kind and respectful.

Aye, life does bring hardships to all, a lot of which seems unjust and unfair. But I also see it as being an important aspect of building who we are and who we will become. Dark days make us draw into the deepest parts of our character, to bring forth the very core of our strength and to lead us towards bettering ourselves and being the best we can be.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet I know enough to know that I don't know it all and one thing I am taking from SW is that Love is all we need and that intelligent people are the most least happy in life and whats more is actions strongly determine thoughts and feelings, sarcasm is a subtle form of bullying and the best way is to be kind to yourself because bad things happens to good people as welI. also I found out that I am stronger than I thought and not as dumb as most people think and that goes for everyone. Most importantly and my favourite is that MOST people are good!
A man sees what a man sees!
it's been an amazing experience
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife I don't know your past and what you have been through, but I'm glad that you made those discoveries and feel that way about yourself now. Throughout this time we have spoken you've always come across as a bright, observant and intelligent person.

Love, in its many forms, can make all the difference.

Most people are indeed good. When it seems otherwise, when it seems like a place is full of cruel people, it usually comes down to a vocal minority. The ones most easily heard are the ones that screams the loudest, so to speak, not the ones going about their business being patient, calm and kind.
suchaslife · F
Could you please tell me what you meant by this?

Most people are indeed good. When it seems otherwise, when it seems like a place is full of cruel people, it usually comes down to a vocal minority. The ones most easily heard are the ones that screams the loudest, so to speak, not the ones going about their business being patient, calm and kind. @PirateMonkeyCabinet
PirateMonkeyCabinet · 36-40, M
@suchaslife Imagine this:

You are sitting at a restaurant. 30 tables there, all occupied with 3-4 people on each table. A group of young adults arrive and gets seated. They are loud, scream, obnoxious, don't try to be mindful that there are others there, are rude to the staff, smashes glasses. The police eventually take them away.

As you leave the restaurant all you can think are these extremely rude and loud people. There were 29 other tables there, full of good people who behaved well and were respectful, yet what we'd usually remember is that one table where trouble brewed.

The next day somewhere else, someone is reading the newspaper. There's an article about these young adults causing trouble in the restaurant. On the next page is an article about this kid who broke into an elderly home and thrashed the place "for fun". The guy reading the newspaper says to himself: "youngsters these days, nothing but trouble". In reality, there may have been 50 kids that did good things that day, but the guy who read the newspaper could only see the bad ones... because the bad ones were the one who grabbed the attention.

When you said:
[quote]Most importantly and my favourite is that MOST people are good![/quote]
...that is what I started thinking about.

We hear about the evildoers all the time, be it on the news or as we witness them on the street, or even here on the internet. They grab our attention and fill it with their cruel antics. It is so easy to start thinking that there world consists of evil before anything else, whilst in reality that ain't true: most people are good people, it just doesn't always feel like that because the fewer who do bad things are the ones that stick out like a sore thumb.

Not sure if I explained what I meant very well (I know I'm not always the best at explaining stuff), and if I got it across properly. Hopefully I did.
suchaslife · F
@PirateMonkeyCabinet I understand, thank you.