I Am Fighting Suicidle Thoughts

If you see me during the day. You wouldn't have a single clue what I fight at night.

I'm usually happy. I dance to some music when it's playing. I laugh and make jokes. I work hard. And I love talking to people.

But at night.

I cry. I shake my head trying to shake away the bad thoughts. I look at the past in the face as it tares me apart. I don't live in the past. But the past lives inside my head. And shows me eveything that I've done wrong. And replays the things done against me. As the demons tell me I deserve it.

And I let it bleed out...

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Dan193 · 31-35, M

You don't deserve it, because u did nothing wrong. You were just in a bad place and that is not your fault. I wish everyone got love and warmth, especially as children, but unfortunatelly not many get the perfect parents/childhood. So instead on lingering on the past, you could focus on becoming the perfect parent yourself. And make somebody else's childhood perfect, or even adopt and save somebody else from their hell.