I have alot of thoughts my mind is running all over the place with therapy.

My big question is what do i do next? What are my options? So i just went to couples therapy with my husband and its great he was fine there he is willing to go again. Thats what i have that i can work with always a positive when hes willing to go back. He does not think therapy works or even does anything,He thinks there is no problem he thinks the only problem is that he dosent make enough money and that i am pressuring him too much. I know he just spends too much, We have been together since 2020 he was 20 back then now we gave been married for a year and a half.he spends too much money thats the main issue he can spend some money on himself but not the amount he is spending. He buys things impulsively . And the main reason i dont go shopping with him is he needs to learn how to spend money when i am not around. Because most of his big purchases are online ones. His mom supports him she has a spending problem too. So my question, if we budgeted and hes not sticking to his budget what can I do? I proposed haveing everything as automatic payments coming out of his account including a certain amount that just goes into saveings because he has no savings. But if he dosent agree to that is there anything i can do short of divorce. We have kids together so i need him to focus on saving for them. Sorryfor this long post

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Renkon · M

Overspending is honestly the least of what troubles marriages these days. The fact that he's willing to go to therapy with you is a good sign ... it means Communication is still alive between you two, and that's the spine of any real relationship, right next to trust.

But ultimately, only you can make this call. You're the one actually living it.

Girlyfriendcollecting · F

@Renkon thank you im glad its not a big issue its fixable he turned 26 this year. So im giving him intil 30 to change. I am just trying to keep my hopes up every time he overspends meanwhile im living for months not buying anything and only haveing 6 dollars in my bank account. We have no way of talking about money any time we do he pulls out his leftist excuses

dale74 · M

At least you are trying to work on it. Hope he gets well soon

QuietReverie

Why does he overspend, Is it a lack within himself?
There’s often a deeper meaning why we do things, get to the root of his spending habits.

Girlyfriendcollecting · F

@QuietReverie yea he does we have talked about it the beat advice i get is for him to consider add medication because this is impulse control. He is afraid to try meds. I am too so i get his point

PinkMoon · 26-30, F

Divorce. He isn't going to change.

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