private therapy - what does anyone think about this

i'm under the mental health services for my severe psychological problems, i've been under that care most of my adult life now....but the support hasn't always been great and wasn't always there when i needed it, especially in my younger years, i'm 48 now.................as i said i'm under the mental health services but there's a long waiting list for therapy, and i suffer with a severe mental disorder and ptsd too.

and just recently i've been looking into the private route to get some therapy, so far i've contacted 5 private therapists local to me, all female therapists, i phone one, left a message on her voicemail just saying what i'm inquiring about, about my psychological problems, my name, what support i'm hoping for, my contact details, mobile number and landline, my email address.......but she never responded and it's been weeks now.

i contacted another therapist local to me, told her all the same details about my inquiry, my name, problems etc and she sent me a text telling me ' sorry not taking any new clients right now, sorry about that ' - when in her profile on the private therapy directory website, it said she is available and taking on new clients....so i thought wtf!?

then the other 3 therapists i phoned who i managed to communicate with, 2 of them sent me a text and said ' yes i'm available, i could offer a free consultation by phone, when's best to phone you? ' so i told them 'great' and told them an appropriate time and date to phone, they came back with ' fine, i'll phone you on such and such a date and this time etc'.................but then the day before that date they were due to phone, i get a text saying

' sorry i have looked at my client list, or looked at my books and decided not to take on new clients at the moment, sorry about that'.

then the final therapist who i contacted sounded more promising and ethical, she said

' oh im busy at the moment but send me your email and i could forward you some info about my practice, then you could decide whether you'd like a call, i could offer a 20 minute consultation next week from tuesday onwards, best wishes '

so i replied to that and said ' hi, that would be fine for a consultation from tuesday onwards, what day was you thinking? also my email is - then gave her my email address.

then she got back by text again and said 'hi ive sent some information over for you now, i could call you at 1:30 on tuesday if that suits you? also there was some interference when you said your name on the message if you could send that to me now? thanks.'

so then again i replied back to that ' hi there, yeah tuesday at 1:30 is fine, thanks for getting back in touch, my names so and so '.

then she replied back ' oh ok thanks, i'll call on tuesday '.

so then days go by, until today dawns and i get another text from her ' hi, i've had a look at my numbers and decided not to take on any new clients for the time being. sorry about that, goodluck in your search for a suitable therapist. best wishes ( then her name).

so at this point, i'm thinking what the heck? and feeling exasperated, so i fired a text back and said ' hi, i feel very let down by how you've been with me, telling me one thing and then doing another, it doesn't help with having trust issues at all, and also i think it's unprofessional of you '.

so then an hour went by after my text, then i got a short text back saying ' i'm very sorry '.

so after that i phoned the private therapy phone number, the organization who sent me the therapist directory by email and complained to them about my experiences with the therapists i've contacted so far...i was really annoyed and completely justified by being so.

also with my mental disorder, i often have feelings of being socially alienated by people, so because this has happened at the hands of ' so called' ' professional' people, it doesn't help my trust with people of the feelings of alienation i have...

any thoughts?