Anxiety is exhausting

Does anyone else have “cancel anxeity” ? Before plans, especially plans that involve large groups of people or people I don’t know well, I start feeling sick, can’t relax or calm down etc.. and then cancel the very last minute with a big excuse.. I feel extremely guilty afterwards.

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CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

No, if I commit I follow through. But anxiety prevents me from planning in the first place or causes me to say no right off the bat without giving the offer any chance. There's just something in me that convinces me that I won't like it.
On the other hand, if some other circumstances cause that the event is cancelled I sometimes feel huge relief or happiness. Suddenly I can appreciate that I can retreat to my usual activities and stereotype without fearing the possible discomforts and all the unknown.