Today was quite shitty

I was so angry and frustrated today. At times I would just make faces and curse at things in front of me. I felt so wrong yet so natural. I was letting myself go, and maybe hoping to become completely mad and have a meltdown. I wanted to see how low I can sink and what my brain is capable of.

The thing is that from outside no one will know why am acting like this. Yet here I am!

I guess it just a mix of many tiny things and a few large things which are piling in my head and I have no way to resolve them. Things are accumulating for years now with no resolution and no reason for them to stop in future.

And tomorrow it will again be the same! What a life!