how can i be less ' on my guard' when i go out

when i go out in public, i'm often on my guard and tense, aloof as well, mainly because in the past i was violently assailed a few times in public, and it traumatised me...so, all these years later i'm often on my guard and tense when i have to go outside...i'm aloof with people................but being this way is not going to make me any friends, and a friend or two is what i would like, even a romantic relationship.....but not if i'm on my guard, tense and aloof with folk.

so do you have any tips for me on how to relax and be less on my guard?

Dainbramadge · 56-60, M

Well situational awareness is your friend.
But you just need to learn to work with it not settle it down.
Function with in.
Practice makes perfect.
Time in the saddle.
You just need to do it more, go out, and get your sea legs.