Making new friends is hard in 2024

I have no friends at all. I've tried everyway you possibly can, going to activity groups, trying to start up random conversations with strangers, contact old peers that I used to be in contact with, but it always just fizzles out for whatever reason. I don't think I am that boring. I try my best to be engaged, listen and also talk but it seems like I am not important enough to maintain a connection, just a mere good conversation. Don't get me wrong I appreciate a good conversation at any time but some times I wish there was more to it then that. Am I the only one who feels this way? I just want to laugh, hang out and be myself with someone again if that is even possible today. Am I being too entitled?

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fun4us2b · M

You just need one good friend - then things grow from there - there's probably someone you know that you're overlooking....

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SW-User

@fun4us2b Yes exactly. It is funny you say that because I don't even care for a group of friends. My desire is just one good friend now but then again that is also a risky situation because over time you can start to rely on that one person for everything, and if you lose that person you are back at square one

fun4us2b · M

@SW-User Yes but it tends to branch out - you invite a friend from work, then they do and somehow over time a group can start to form around the 2 that started it!

SW-User

@fun4us2b It might also be because I am an introvert these days. I guess in my ideal world having one bestfriend is better than 4 regular friends who don't care as much. In reality yes you are correct, having a group of friends is what works the best, having a string or network of connections that branches out so you are not relying on just one person and clinging on to them. Some times it doesn't work though. Some times one friend out of the group may like you but the rest do not. So it can get tricky some times

fun4us2b · M

@SW-User it's trail and error - the goal should be to have fun and keep trying new things. Volunteering is good too....

SW-User

@fun4us2b Yes this is true. It is about the journey not the end. I used to volunteer at a soup kitchen. There were a lot of older ladies so it was hard to make friends with them lol

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@fun4us2b I remember introducing someone to a cousin in high school. They became best friends and left me out💁🏽‍♀️

SW-User

@iamnikki That has happened to me also. I am so very sorry you went thru that. You must've felt so betrayed

fun4us2b · M

@SW-User There's other stuff to volunteer - but yes it's hit and miss - when I was in my mid-teens I somehow volunteered at a horse stable, wow, there were lot's of girls there!

fun4us2b · M

@iamnikki That's lousy -hard to take, but you're probably better off being rid of them....

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@fun4us2b I just started volunteering. Once a month so far. The volunteer job I had was fast paced, which was good because I was out in no time, but I really only chatted with 3 people. I chatted with two of them while waiting for it to start since I got there early and chatted with another person while we did the job. All three of them worked there so...I was hoping I could make friends with other volunteers.
I doubt employees would want to make friends with volunteers, it would probably be weird.

fun4us2b · M

@iamnikki I guess it really depends - people that like each other tend to find a way. And nice of you to volunteer....you're helping someone and your time is valuable.