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Join the club. lol. Nope. You're not even close. We all do things we regret but this is the way we learn and grow, it's just a part of life and this will happen until we cross over. Don't resent it. Learn from it. You're doing great! I have embarrassed myself at times and oh boy is that hard to take but then I just have to acknowledge that when you know better, you do better. It's only a bump in the road, my friend. Spiritual growing pains. 🙏🙏🤗🤗😘