I have lost all motivation and cannot bring myself to get anything done.

At this point in my life I feel like breaking down and giving up. Been trying to get my life and finances together but it's been tough. It's one thing after the other. Take two steps forward just to take 5 back. It's either my family and friends consuming me with their issues, or me failing to successfully fight my demons. At 32 I'm just miserable, from the outside looking in people think I have a great life and have lots of money. I don't, I'm this lonely guy that can manage to take care of other people's problems and not my own. I've been in a downward spiral of anxiety, depression and drinking. I've done some really bad things because of it. Nothing to hurt anyone, just say a lot of time and money was wasted. I'm just mentally and emotionally drained and exhausted. I feel like any day I'll just snap. Just always have 1000 thoughts going through my head. I know things have to change, just don't have the will.