I'm Bitter
How did I become this way? Somewhere along the way, I lost myself. I have cried myself to sleep for countless nights.
I hate seeing people happy with their spouse and kids coz it reminds me of what I don't have. I avoid checking people's social media posts to reduce my bitterness though I know online posts may not be a true reflection of their real lives.
I hate seeing people getting married for the second time or more when it has yet to happen to me even once especially when some of these people are pretty nasty. I scoff when I see weddings coz of how bitter I feel.
I hate that people make fun of my single status and have a good laugh about it. What have these mean people done to deserve a spouse and kids?
Yes I know that they may be unhappily married or whatever else. Still, it hurts so much to be the subject of their joke about the one topic I'm truly touchy about. Every single time, I pretend that I'm not affected but it cuts me deeply.
Even my own mother said this, "Serves you right for not being married till now!".
She has said plenty of mean things to me over the years but this comment takes the cake! Since then, I have stopped talking to her. It has been over 2 years now. I feel crappy enough about this! How can my own mother tell me such things?!
I hate that I still yearn for a significant other at this age. I wish I don't coz it will make things so much easier and less painful.
As a friend once mentioned, God is cool but God can't hug you when you sleep at night. How apt.
I hate seeing people happy with their spouse and kids coz it reminds me of what I don't have. I avoid checking people's social media posts to reduce my bitterness though I know online posts may not be a true reflection of their real lives.
I hate seeing people getting married for the second time or more when it has yet to happen to me even once especially when some of these people are pretty nasty. I scoff when I see weddings coz of how bitter I feel.
I hate that people make fun of my single status and have a good laugh about it. What have these mean people done to deserve a spouse and kids?
Yes I know that they may be unhappily married or whatever else. Still, it hurts so much to be the subject of their joke about the one topic I'm truly touchy about. Every single time, I pretend that I'm not affected but it cuts me deeply.
Even my own mother said this, "Serves you right for not being married till now!".
She has said plenty of mean things to me over the years but this comment takes the cake! Since then, I have stopped talking to her. It has been over 2 years now. I feel crappy enough about this! How can my own mother tell me such things?!
I hate that I still yearn for a significant other at this age. I wish I don't coz it will make things so much easier and less painful.
As a friend once mentioned, God is cool but God can't hug you when you sleep at night. How apt.
46-50, F
