Is letting someone know that they hurt your feelings mature?

Or is it immature?
I just went off on a guy friend because I shared my concerns about my stepdaughters health problems and he couldn't get past me mentioning she has bowel dysfunctions that cause her to leak stool. What set me off: "no offense but I don't want to talk about some little girl pooping her pants that's nasty."
That little girl is a child that I love, and she's living in a complex social situation, depressed, and I'm worried for her and upset that I'm seeing her suffer, and I can't do anything about it. Long story.

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SW-User

[c=#4C0073]that guy .. is he 13? he cant handle talking about a medical condition of your step daughter's that clearly is upsetting you? ..
He is immature, not you.[/c]

CaptainCanadia · 41-45, M

A lot of maturity is being able to face difficult or uncomfortable things with a cool head. Telling him that he was hurtful is absolutely the mature thing to do.

KingofPizza2 · 36-40, M

I think it's more immature to shoot down a friend because you think the problem they're discussing is "nasty".

plungesponge · 41-45, M

It's immature to always bring it up when your feelings are hurt, but it's also immature if someone is repeatedly hurting you and you don't set your boundaries

plungesponge · 41-45, M

in that instance, I'd probably say it's an off-the-cuff stupid remark. I wouldn't make a big scene over it, but I would probably say "woooahhh, hey, that's my step daughter you're talking about"

Starkizzed21 · 31-35, F

@plungesponge: that's pretty much what I did. He got a bit defensive like you don't need to go into detail. I let him know there are better ways to let other people know you would rather not discuss something.
He is stoned,watching the walking dead, and that totally explains his lack of insensitivity.

Serenitree · F

let's face it, he knows. You can tell him, but unless he's twelve, he has to know that you weren't just making casual conversation about poop

Feb. 13/17
1:55 am
EST

SINAI · T

That's what they told us in school.

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