Once a Christian.

I was brought up to go to Church and Sunday School and at the age of eight i made a profession of faith at seventeen I was baptised but as the years passed I have back slidden and although I attend Church I have little interest in spiritual things, even my language has a lot to be desired, sometimes I wish that I could get back to being a Christian,but I find it very difficult.

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LesDawsonsPiano · 70-79

For what it's worth, God aka Tao, aka Amida, aka Reality-as-is.......does NOT backslide.

My eyes being hindered by blind passions,
I cannot perceive the light that grasps me;
Yet the great compassion, without tiring,
Illumines me always (Shinran, of the Buddhist Pure Land Faith)

Or from Mother Julian of Norwich:-

If there be anywhere on earth a lover of God who is always kept safe, I know nothing of it, for it was not shown to me. But this was shown: that in falling and rising again we are always kept in that same precious love.

Faith NOT works. And even faith is given, gift.