I'm an agnostic Satanist, ask me anything

If your a Satanist ? Please don't get offended . Does that mean u hate yourself so much and that God won't forgive u so u choose the easier side of life that u get rewards from the outer world instead of having God inside u ,
No ones perfect but i aim for it and also i won't get there until im 6 feet under .
See the lower power is inside everyone .
Do u know what that is ? Listening to voices inside your head and going ahead and believing them and then doing the actions that are inside your head .
That to me is Satanism.
Then theres the other side which is a beautiful way of life but as what i said u never get it perfect .
Im not telling u who to believe but if i had your belief id be demented and full of fear for the rest of my life
I don't know your situation that made u believe in that .
Was either getting hurt bad that turned u against God or was u done something bad that u think u won't be forgiven .
But choosen that way of life u be driven by a 100 forms of fear that way .
I supposes the 100 forms of form numbs u so u feel nothing and your constantly trying to numb yourself .
Or else you could numb yourself after being hurt so bad u don't want to know nothing about the pain so u get mixed up thinking your bad or evil .
We"ll i just throw a bit of ideas at u .
I was in hell with my mind and i tell u something after coming out of that hell there's no way i want to go back there .
I refuses to .