What's wrong with me? It is not getting better.

I still can't understand subtle social cues. It's getting to me again. It's so so so so apparent that I don't understand them that people get extremely irritated with me. I really don't understand why I'm like this. It's like I'm extremely blind to some very important unsaid conversations and it frustrates me. Trying to keep up with all of this at work is so exhausting. Pretending I understand them. But not quite understanding them. Repeating myself a couple times or three because I think what I said was not heard, when it had been acknowledged by body language (I suppose)? Bcz I only get it when it's said "yes yes I get it!!!" In an annoyed voice.

I'm tired of life.
And today as well. A very short sentence said to me by my landlord who seemed irritated by me repeating myself...has left me in tears.
I so desperately want to understand what I'm missing. It makes survival extremely exhausting this way.