Random Upset Rantings

@Thinkerbell Like I saw a sign it said this... and they don't believe that the sign actually said that.

Or when they were looking at new property, one had a small brook running through it, that only started less than a mile away.

I asked if had fish in it, my dad started laughing hard at me for the dumb question, reminding me it just starts not the far away.

But the property owner then answered yes, that it has minnows in the brook and sometimes water birds stop to try to eat them.

@Viper

But what did your dad say when he heard the property owner's answer?
Did he think the owner's answer was dumb too?

It could have led to an interesting discussion of how fast the brook was flowing, minnows swimming upstream, etc.

Or did your dad just ignore the owner's answer?
Or sometimes, some people can be proved wrong, and maybe even acknowledge it at the time, but a week later they go back to believing what they believed in the first place. 🙄

As for the sign example, I guess nothing short of a picture of the sign would have convinced them that they were wrong. 🤷‍♀️

@Thinkerbell Ignore the answer.

And they did buy the property. And we know there are minnows, he even fed them for a while.

We believe they did into the mud during the winters to survive, probably got their via birds, instead of swimming up stream. (Fish eggs are sticky and stick to bird feathers and can come unattached when they laid, or get back in water).

@Viper

So what does your dad say when you remind him of how he laughed at you for asking if there were fish in the brook?

Does he pretend not to remember?

[btw, it sounds very plausible of how the minnows got there; interesting]

@Thinkerbell He just stays quiet or doesn't remember... or says he didn't think there were.

I'd just like a little credit, and not nessarily in this situation...

But he cuts me down many many times... and he rarely builds me up, unless it's also building himself up.

@Viper

That's a sad situation, when parents tear their kids down... 😞

Growing up, my parents always encouraged me, and when I screwed up (of course that was VERY rare 😂), they were quick to forgive and forget.

@Thinkerbell My dad does help, a lot, but it's with actions... in some ways, he's that strong silent type.

But when he's verbal, it's usually negative or neutral.

I do find it funny, that my dad and I can have entire short conversations without saying a word, and my Mom is trying to figure how something is going to be done, when we had the entire silence discussion right in front of her face 😂

I guess we just have a non-verbal connection lol

@Viper

Sign language?
Mental telepathy? 🤔

@Thinkerbell All of the above, also body language, and experience together, plus it helps when there are limited options...

Like, there are three ways to fix this... which one is he doing?

@Viper

Well, it's good that your dad is helpful with his actions.

Does you mom build you up verbally, or at least not tear you down?

@Thinkerbell My Mom doesn't do either, she's a worrier lol, drives me crazy at times with worrying, but I understand. And I'm like her in a lot of ways.

But she didn't understand why I didn't tell her things for the longest time, and it's like, it's because you just throw it back in my face, worrying about it.

And she said she would stop, and to give her a chance and so I did, and told her I was behind in a college research paper, but I was over stressed and needed to relax a bit ... And right on time, before the night was over, she freaked out, worrying, and putting pressure on me and I pointed out, AND THIS is why I don't tell you things lol, and she got it lol .


They're both very very much workaholics! They don't understand the idea of relaxing lol, working is relaxing to them

@Viper

Yes, there are some people who get stressed if they are aren't working.
'Idle hands are the devil's workshop," etc.

And some parents' emotional makeups just aren't well-matched to that of their kids.

@Thinkerbell yup, in some ways I'm exactly like them, in other ways I'm the exact opposite.

Also, I find it interesting, that I have some mental help issues, and my dad side does as well, including him, but he can't mentally relate.

It's weird, like he was taught to bury that sh!t so much, and did so, to the point that he can no longer see it...

But he absolutely gets depressed if he has nothing to do, he needs projects or work, and to get outside, and be doing something, or he clearly gets depressed and grumpy.

@Viper

It's paradoxical that there are some people who are very good at working through the steps of an actual physical project, but who are not good at thinking through a logical chain of more abstract ideas, even relatively simple ones.