I have recognized an anxious attachment style to myself that at times it's turning to avoidant

This happens due to my movement and oscillations, from remote to central and back.

My capability of such a movement is a great gift, I do recognize that too, and yet uhm -
the symptoms are still there - it is because my movement requires me to be free of attachments for when I am into hermitage, cocooning has to be this way.

And then, when again I am entering the world into my new transformation, I am falling from the nest, and there's none to catch me - and yes I see - this is the way to learn how to flight - and yet still

I am feeling un-held - - -