Despite being into hard rock and nu metal most of my life, I think if I was musically gifted I’d want to make music women want to strip to.

Metallica and Motley Crüe ARE hard rock. Can’t tell you how many dollar bills I’ve given away while girls girls girls played.

Is that when you show them your prune balls?

It'd make more sense, then (not to mention being easier) to approach it from the other end- find a better class of stripper. Realistically, I imagine most of them grow pretty jaded (and develop attitudes toward sexuality that are somehow even MORE unhealthy than those of their peers), but those who aren't professionals probably have some capacity to still find it fun, or at least appreciate the challenge.

If there isn't, somewhere out there, a woman trying to figure out how to strip to Frank Zappa's "Dancin' Fool", then I, for one, will be very disappointed in humanity.

was that Salma Hayek?