If you ever need an excuse to get out of something, I’m your girl

I can come up with excuses tailored to your life, to get you out of all kinds of situations. I can be your daughter/sister/cousin/partner/neighbor with all kinds of different problems. I can come up with illnesses, emergencies, important errands, and obligations. I can call and loudly cry and beg for your help while you’re in front of other people.
Just let me know. I love being crafty and dramatic.

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Turtlepower · 36-40, M

That kind of sounds fun

itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower it really is a lot of fun 😅

Turtlepower · 36-40, M

@itsok I'd just want to do this to troll friends lol

itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower let’s do itttttt

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itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower oh my gosh, YES. I wrote this post because I offered to be pregnant so my sister could get out of taking her son to a soccer game on Saturday, and it made me realize I love doing this for people. 😂
You and I haven’t known each other long, but we became close very quickly. We even have matching birthmarks. I’m naming my firstborn after you, and I NEED you at the hospital. I’m feeling the Braxton hicks already

Turtlepower · 36-40, M

@itsok 😂 I'm dying right now and my half asleep wife is so confused lol

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itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower tell her the baby’s middle name is going to be her name. You guys have helped me feel like I have a family for the first time in my life 😂

itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower OH WAIT. Next time they ask, we found out we aren’t related and my birthmark turned out to be a coffee stain

So I change my child’s name

Turtlepower · 36-40, M

@itsok 😂 stuff like this is fun to think about.

itsok · 31-35, F

@Turtlepower then I’ll sue you for the price it costs to change a baby’s name. It’ll be a long drawn out case with several court dates to get you out of all kinds of obligations