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Just need to vent a bit about stuff...

I'm hopelessly in love with my best friend and I hate it. Whenever her and I text, i cant help but to smile like an idiot. Whenever I hear her voice, anything that's been bothering me is instantly forgotten. Whenever I see a picture of her, a wave of calm and peace washes over me. I love her so much, I love every fiber of her being. She's in nearly every thought of mine, from the second I wake up to my last conscious moments before falling asleep. Nearly any and everything reminds me of her... so it hurts knowing she'll never love me as much or in the same way. Yesterday, she went out with a guy she's romantically interested in so she could get to know him better. I'm happy for her, she deserves to be happy, she deserves the world... and yet, it also feels like a punch to the gut knowing that. I just want her to be happy. She'll never find out how I feel about her.

Okay, thats all I have to say for now. Take care, hope you all have/had a good day
NotSoWiseDude
13-15, MNew
2 replies 34 views 2 days ago2 d
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NotSoWiseDude · 13-15, MNew
@Whittleisstressed well.... i don't really like seeing love as a "waiting game" because it just makes me feel like sht, like I'm just sticking around and waiting for my turn to date her... but I get what your saying tho. Something that i should've mentioned is that she's an online friend so i havent met her in person but i plan on going to visit her when i both turn 18 and get the money to. As of rn too, she's my only friend (or the only person i could comfortable call a friend) and i also love her as a friend. I don't want to lose her if we do date and things don't go well as her and I do not stay in contact with our exes. And as for the "other fish in the sea", about 95% of the people here where i live, every is a cousin, it's a small town with no paved roads and a population of like 350 last time i checked........... also, idk if that was your post i saw about your academic situation and suicidal thoughts.. but i hope things get better for you, you seem like a wonderful person
+ 1 · Reply · Translate · 2 days ago2 d
 
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