Sorry you're dealing with that bull crap. I lived through the same before I called it quits with my ex. To gain any order in your life, including finding new circles of friends, join a group that he is not part of. If he looks through your phone, don't rule out 12-step programs. Because there's 12-step programs out there for people that have been abused. And people who are in current situations of abuse. Join any kind of group that he is not aware of. I'll give you an example. For the shit hit the fan with my ex, I joined a 12-step program called ACA. They had meetings on Tuesday nights and Friday nights. My ex didn't like it. But she never had the balls to destroy my 12-step program books. Try Advantage education. Community College classes. Labor unions. If you're a Christian, find a new church. If you've accepted Wicca as your lord and savior find a new coven. Think about changing your religion. Or looking at your own religion in a whole new light by learning about another religion. Anything that affords you an opportunity to meet other people. If you can afford it financially, move to a new town. At least an hour away. (That's why I had to do to get away from my ex. Because she lived a couple towns over whenever we first got divorced. And then after that I moved North about an hour away. And I didn't have to worry about her showing up at random times.) Gets new social media accounts. Facebook. Twitter. Meetup.com. create your own life. A new life. And new friends will follow.
It will be tough. I know that you know how tough it is. But you can do it. I did it. My family is a thousand miles away. So it's tough as it for me Goddammit, I did it. And so can you!
