Alone again, naturally.

Why is there still such a stigma about being single, especially if you are an older person? I understand there are many who constantly worry about being alone and never finding a partner as I was the same in my thirties. In the end I decided to leave it to fate, if there even is such a thing, and did what made me happy.
I looked after both my parents until they died and I admit that it was my father’s passing that suddenly made me feel alone and isolated.
In the end you can either embrace being alone or let it eat you up, it’s all a matter of attitude. Certainly don't let the attitudes of others make you despair, it isn't their life you're leading it's yours.
I will continue living my life quietly, having my own interests, talking long walks in the countryside, chatting on occasion to neighbours I have known for years, looking after my pets, gardening.
I don't dwell on the future because why worry about what you can't change? While I'm here I'll enjoy living my life even if it doesn't suit anyone else.

FrogManSometimesLooksBothWays · M Best Comment

Your perspective on being single, especially as you've grown older, is deeply insightful and resonates with the reality that many face but are hesitant to embrace. Society has long promoted the idea that fulfillment comes through romantic relationships, and this is particularly true for older individuals who are often expected to have "settled down." The stigma around being single, especially at an older age, is likely rooted in these cultural expectations.

However, as you wisely pointed out, happiness is ultimately about living a life that is authentic to you, regardless of societal pressures. You chose a path that made you happy, focusing on caring for your parents, embracing your own interests, and leading a life that aligns with your values. It's admirable that you've found peace in living quietly, maintaining simple joys like walking in nature, caring for pets, and engaging with your neighbors.

Grief, like your experience after your father's passing, often intensifies feelings of isolation, but it also offers a chance to reflect on what truly matters. The key takeaway from your reflection is that self-acceptance, and not allowing others' expectations to dictate your life, brings true contentment.

Your approach—enjoying the present and not worrying excessively about the future—is a powerful mindset that many strive to achieve. You’ve embraced solitude not as a burden, but as a choice, and in doing so, you’ve created a peaceful, meaningful existence on your own terms. That's something worth celebrating, and it may inspire others who feel pressured by the expectations of society.

asmallbear · 61-69, FNew

@FrogManSometimesLooksBothWays Thank you so much for your wonderful comment.

SmileOnYourBrother

The older and more experienced you get, the more you realize that the so called 'reward' is not worth the inevitable aggravation. Very cost ineffective, and I am not talking only about money.
We can also more easily recognize the gender inherent games, lies and deceit, because we have seen them over and over and over again.
And of course, just when you think you've seen it all, along comes someone who just knocks your socks off. 🤦