I Know You Dont Know Me

Okay. Well, it’s hard for me to even understand myself. The things I do, the stuff I say. It’s all a puzzle. I’m a complex person and part of why I can’t handle a relationship is because I can barely handle myself. However, after a recent talk with a few people, I realized that some somehow know you inside and out and everything about you. Sometimes we see things in people that the person at hand doesn’t see themselves, which is fine. However to claim you know everything about me is a lie. I hold a lot in, I have a dark past, I have things I don’t like to talk about. It’s very difficult finding out who I am and for some to say they know who I am bothers me. Maybe I’m too blind to see the real me, maybe I’m right there for all to see and I just can’t see it. I am just bothered that people are claiming to understand me when I can’t understand myself some days

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

Karmalives · 51-55, M

Take it easy my friend

Throger · 26-30, M

@Karmalives I am trying. I’m not quite sure what I’m doing at this point in my life

Karmalives · 51-55, M

@Throger ok.. What are you bothered by the most?

Throger · 26-30, M

@Karmalives the things I do. I don’t know. I don’t handle things the best. Honestly I need a dose of reality. I’ve taken it easy for far too long and now I have no idea where to start in life. I’ve used my mental illness as an excuse for too long

Karmalives · 51-55, M

@Throger what was your mental illness called if it is ok to Ask?

Throger · 26-30, M

@Karmalives they diagnosed me years ago as having bipolar depression. Now after seeing a psychiatrist, she thinks I have major depression and an anxiety disorder

Karmalives · 51-55, M

@Throger you say you don't handle things the best, what would help you handle them better?

Throger · 26-30, M

@Karmalives to be honest. I don’t know. I’ve been trying to find ways to handle situations better, everything just seems to fail. My mind just keeps churning and it doesn’t stop. Just keeps going and making ridiculous scenarios in my head and I make things worse than they need to be. It’s hard to just stop it as well

Karmalives · 51-55, M

@Throger So basically the mind just keeps thinking, and goes from one thought to the other with out completely solving or acomplishing anything ?

Throger · 26-30, M

@Karmalives yes, that’s a good way of putting it. Or if the thought is finished it’s a completely out of context or it’s some made up thought just to say I finished thinking about it if that makes sense