I Am Lonely

I have no self-esteem. I don't believe anyone could actually want me. It makes me deeply suspicious of anyone who's nice to me. And I feel like an idiot, being 30 and feeling this way. Something is wrong with me.

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Mguinm · 51-55, F

I'm 48 and single lol. I wish I were 30 again. I do have self esteem though. You have to look at things from a different perspective. You are worthy of love and you will find it! Baby steps with the positivity. You can do this! I understand the internet being a cruel place but there are lovely people in here if you give them a chance. Just don't give up!

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@Mguinm Well I doubt you've been single for 48 years

Mguinm · 51-55, F

@iamnikki No I haven't. So this poster has been single his whole life? I didn't know the details. There is still hope, always. He's still young.

iamnikki · 31-35, F

@Mguinm I don't know, I was just sayin

Xuan12 · 31-35, M

@Mguinm My last relationship was a bit over 2 years ago. I was with her for 5 years and committed a personally extraordinary amount of effort to helping her overcome severe depression. Nary a cross word or voice of anger crossed my lips. To support her and make her feel valuable was the only thing I ever tried to do. When I needed to feel valued though, the relationship quickly ended. I still feel like human garbage.

Mguinm · 51-55, F

@Xuan12 well if it makes you feel any better last 12 years I've been strapped down being a caregiver and I've only had online relationships, a heck of a lot of heartbreak and I just had to let go of my soulmate. We are similar in tht fact that we had to give up and sacrificed for others when we needed help most of all. I'm sorry you went through it. You aren't garbage at all. Depression is a hard thing to overcome and it's not your fault you tried your best with her. Don't beat yourself up!

Xuan12 · 31-35, M

@Mguinm It just feels terrible, giving so much and then being abandoned. It's difficult not to internalize a sense of worthlessness.

Mguinm · 51-55, F

@Xuan12 I've been abandoned my whole life and all I've done is give give give to everybody, my heart my soul, my time, hard labor, give up my health and well being for others. You will find a better day, a better life. Read inspirational quotes, get out for a walk and enjoy nature. Do something you love. Is there anything you like to do?

Xuan12 · 31-35, M

@Mguinm Thanks. I'm starting to reach the point where I'm more embarrassed than lonely. 😅

Mguinm · 51-55, F

@Xuan12 Nothing to be embarrassed about! You'll get through it. Find something funny you like to watch on TV or the internet. Just do positive things sunshine.