I Am Lonely

I just finished my first year of college of a 4 year major and I was feeling pretty down the whole year because I found it really hard to get people to like me and want to be friends with me. The first few months I was friendly with this girl but I kinda felt the whole time she didn't really like me and was just using me when she had no other friends around. She never invited me back to her place where there was always some kind of house party on and she never responded to me asking if she wanted to come over some time. I hung out with her and her friends between lectures but they never wanted much to do with me any other time. After a while they didn't even wanna hang between classes. One time I asked this one girl if she was going to the festival in a weeks time and she said no and turned away from me. Then I was at the festival and I saw her and said hey and she blanked me in front of everyone. I went to the festival cause everyone in my class was going and I thought I would really push myself socially even though I wasn't friends with any of them. A couple of them I talked to just kind of dismissed me or gave me a dirty look when I spoke. The guys I found to be a billion times nicer and I did make 2 guy friends one of whom I also meet outside of class and this summer. While I appreciate those guys I do wish I had made one female friend to share a more emotional friendship with where I can talk about certain things with. This guy that I was half friends with cause hes from my hometown and goes to my school invited me to his party and I met all his friends who were very artsy and eccentric and they were probably some of the nicest people I've ever met but I never see them because we study on opposite sides of the campus and we don't share any classes. It's really hard to get through my major with classes that are so long without having many people I can chat to now and again to relax. I was so down last year that I stopped going to a lot of classes and failed 2. I don't know whether I should keep trying hard to make friends or would I be better off spending my time just studying and finishing my degree without having friends. College is supposed to be the most fun time of your life but I'm not having that life at all ..

Moribund · 26-30, M

I suppose the best way to actually make friends - true friends, at that - is to simply be yourself and roll with the punches. I know what you're feeling and well, mostly it's just a matter of waiting it out. Sooner or later there someone will see you for what you really are and won't let go. All we need to do is wait. And yet that's the hardest part, isn't it?

I hope you'll find someone to have some good times with soon. That's what college is all about - making friendships that last a lifetime. Best of luck to you!