I saw my doctor.
I came there riddled with anxiety lol, cause last night was awful, and I haven't been able to shake the feeling^^
I told her straight up that if I don't get help, I don't see myself ever being able to work full-time or getting better, like I'm having a really hard time seeing myself as healed at any point right now. I also said that I don't have a depression disorder, but that the depression I feel is linked to my cptsd and how I'm doing mentally right now and that that's not the worst part, which she said was concerning cause my score was very high🙄. She asked if I've tried other meds, and I said that I don't want to try anything, I just want proper treatment, and to get off the medications so that I can get my life "back". I want to work, I want to help people, I want to be a good wife and one day a good mother, I want to love myself, but I need help to get there, and not just medicine...
So now I'll just wait for them to answer.. See if they'll accept it or decline.
In the meantime, I said yes to another market.. Last marked drained me, and I collapsed when I got home and just cried lol (my husband was with me the whole time, so he comforted me), but it took me like 2-3 days to "recover" and feel energetic again. But I want to go, so I'm going and hoping for the best.
I'm also going away this weekend with my husband and family for Super Bowl, and can't wait to relax, have some drinks and just ignore my phone and people for 2 days^^
I told her straight up that if I don't get help, I don't see myself ever being able to work full-time or getting better, like I'm having a really hard time seeing myself as healed at any point right now. I also said that I don't have a depression disorder, but that the depression I feel is linked to my cptsd and how I'm doing mentally right now and that that's not the worst part, which she said was concerning cause my score was very high🙄. She asked if I've tried other meds, and I said that I don't want to try anything, I just want proper treatment, and to get off the medications so that I can get my life "back". I want to work, I want to help people, I want to be a good wife and one day a good mother, I want to love myself, but I need help to get there, and not just medicine...
So now I'll just wait for them to answer.. See if they'll accept it or decline.
In the meantime, I said yes to another market.. Last marked drained me, and I collapsed when I got home and just cried lol (my husband was with me the whole time, so he comforted me), but it took me like 2-3 days to "recover" and feel energetic again. But I want to go, so I'm going and hoping for the best.
I'm also going away this weekend with my husband and family for Super Bowl, and can't wait to relax, have some drinks and just ignore my phone and people for 2 days^^
