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I know it shouldn’t get to me, but…..

My wife (who I do love very much) has gained quite an extreme amount of weight recently, going from size 16 to 18 or 20 depending on the brand of clothing.
She was loyal to me when I was having a bad time in life, I was known for bullying and she would get taunted for going out with ‘that boy who wet himself’.
She put up with a lot just by being seen with me so I want to do the same for her, but just being honest, she isn’t the nicest to look at right now, but I don’t want to say anything to upset her.

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Rabscuttle · 41-45

The modern medical industry has grossly overhyped the dangers of being overweight (chiefly because it's a health aspect people have a good deal of control over), but that doesn't mean there aren't risks.

It's not unreasonable to be bothered by it, and there are positive steps you can take to encourage her to slim down a bit without insulting her- have you tried suggesting you take up some activity that's a form of exercise together?

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Thanks for this. I did buy her a bike, which she loved for about a day! She does like going for country walks, but she lasts about 10 minutes before she needs coffee and cake. 😬😩@Rabscuttle

Rabscuttle · 41-45

@Strongtea Well, it's a start- even slow progress is progress!

Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

She might be depressed about something sometimes that will trigger changes in lifestyle

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Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

@Strongtea
Perhaps this will allow her to be kinder to those who struggle with weight and although ,it would be better ,if it's causing her health problems, to lose the added weight she now sees how hard it is to lose weight once you put it on and may have more empathy in future.
I hope she can get to a place where she's happy.

Strongtea · 22-25, M

I do think she’s been quite humbled by what’s happened to her, she did hurt quite a lot of people when we were growing up and I think she wishes she hadn’t said anything now. It’s not the nicest way to learn a lesson, but she can be a nicer person now. @Justmeraeagain

Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

@Strongtea If truth be told most of us learn that way.
I always think the inward beauty is much more important than outward.
Whether she is big or not I'm sure she's beautiful.

0uijaFinger

This is the weirdest kink

class · F

@0uijaFinger is it?

0uijaFinger

@class yes

class · F

@0uijaFinger 🙁

GoFish · 41-45, F

hmmm idk but stop following your ex gf tho and maybe say something to her even if sge doesn't want to hear it .. also why fo you say you are married and a virgin? what kind of marriage is that?

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GoFish · 41-45, F

@Strongtea ok then but it seems like it is not your choice but only hers to not be physically intimate

Strongtea · 22-25, M

I am really nervous about it but still I do get you, I think she’s just really nervous too. She didn’t really have many boyfriends/dates when we were growing up (we went to the same school) so I think she’s just a bit worried about that stuff. @GoFish

GoFish · 41-45, F

@Strongtea ok then..

class · F

Ir doesnt sound like a healthy weight

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class · F

@Strongtea uk 111 ask for if she can talk to a dietician for free or nurse then after giving d.o.b. name and talking to nurse ask them refer you to dietician to find right alternatives to maintain health or to find out if theres a need to worry. You could probably call them for her to say why you're worried and if it is a real concern.

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Thankyou!@class

class · F

@Strongtea anytime!

EldritchFox

This is shallow tbh. I think eating healthy is important and you could encourage that, maybe cook for her and help support changes. But to say she's not fun to look at, grow up. That's not love.

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

Stupid question but...isn't she pregnant? 😅

Strongtea · 22-25, M

Haha! No I know she isn’t, we’re not there yet. @CrazyMusicLover

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