I Want Others to Accept Me For Who I Am

Showing my true self has never gone well. People are not accepting, as a rule. It is a rarity to find someone with understanding, a big heart, and the capacity to accept differences. It is not their fault, most are trained and taught to fit in, to conform, to be normal. I was too. I know how to act. I know what to say and do. I know what to hide. I know what is acceptable. It is only online that I have found others that are willing to say - I understand, you are not alone. Those are truly beautiful words. For no matter how strong we are, we all need to connect and belong.

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MarkPaul · 26-30, M

I say it's an illusion only because given the circumstances it's easy for people to say, "I support you," "I'm with you." "You can count on me," "You have a friend with me." And, I am not dismissing their most likely well-meaning intention. But, the reality is typing words does not really require that much effort, requires no commitment, and while it can provide the feeling of friendship, it's simply not real.

Illusions often feel real and sometimes they substitute for the real thing. Having a pet as a friend feels real enough, but those who claim all they need is their pet fish, or cat, or dog is living under an illusion. It's easy enough to feel a part of life by watching someone else's personal video, but that's an illusion too. Eating mock-turkey or soy-formed hot dogs can make you feel like you are tasting the real thing (if you use your imagination and discard the after-taste), but it's an illusion. Illusions do work. Reality requires much to achieve, but it just seems like it's better.

I don't feel accepted myself; many times I have trouble even with self-acceptance. It's nice when people here say, "oh, you seem so normal" or "just be yourself and you will do fine." It provides the feeling of being connected, it simply does not carry forward in real-world conditions.

Some people prefer to live under the protection of an illusion. And, I am not attempting to stop them. I just think people like us should be careful about thinking that's the best acceptance we can ever hope to achieve.