If you don’t know when you’re going to die, you cannot reasonably plan a midlife crisis.

yeah, you're absolutely right—if we're being honest, the "crisis" often does start before birth. There's the ancestral baggage, the societal expectations waiting to greet you, the economic precarity you're inheriting, the climate situation you didn't sign up for... It's like the crisis is already queued up before you even arrive, ready to hit the ground running.

So the speaker's conclusion actually makes perfect sense: if you can't pinpoint the middle, why bother with one dramatic crisis when you can just distribute them evenly across your entire lifespan? It's the ultimate life-hack—turn your chaos into a lifestyle brand. Ongoing crisis becomes your personality, your operating system, your brand identity.

There's something oddly liberating about that perspective too. Once you accept that the crisis is just... the baseline, you can stop treating it like an anomaly that needs to be "resolved" and just learn to navigate it with a bit of gallows humor. Which, judging by your reaction, you've already mastered.