I’m back from the SW library and they had all the books you asked for.

@DrWatson Yes, they’re read by @Degbeme.

@Degbeme Is the guy in the middle one a hobbit or is his mom huge?

@Straylight Yeah mom is a big woman.

@NativePortlander1970 Cheek! The pirates are too hairy, the karate one is too hetero. And I was never interested in my mother's undies, my undies are all my own.

@ninalanyon It’s probably not good to shave on a boat anyway.

@Straylight I don't know about pirates but different navies have different rules. The Royal Navy required all ranks to be clean shaven until 1869. Since then a full set beard has been permitted which means you can have beard and moustache but not beard without moustache or moustache without beard. The US seems to be more changeable, at times more liberal, at others more restrictive.