I Will Tell You 10 Things About Me
1.I love my dog a lot, he changed my life for the better when he came along. When my kids are with their dad, he is my company and a great source of cuddles. His enthusiasm for everything makes my day brighter.
2.I've always had a thirst for knowledge. Human behaviour, psychology, consciousness, biology...I just like to know how things work and why they work that way. Because I'm always taking in new information, I don't tend to stay stuck to ideas or ideologies for too long.
3.I used to be very firmly atheist but now I just don't know...simple as that. That does not mean that I am open to being indoctrinated as I am pretty sure that nobody knows for sure what it going on here. I've listened to ideas from all different directions and points in history and my conclusion has just been "hmm, interesting". It would be nice if people could stop killing each other over which idea is best.
4.If you made it through the last paragraph without taking it personally or being butthurt then we could probably be friends :) I love open mindedness, people who can listen to points of view without feeling the need to attack or force theirs on top. An idea is not part of you, there is no need to defend it like it's your first born. An idea can't be hurt just because someone disagrees with it.
5.I meditate every day. It took practise but now when I do it, it's like getting a hug. There is a lot to be said for clearing your mind, it creates space for useful ideas and answers to problems. A brain is like a stomach, put nothing but rubbish into it and it's not going to work well for you.
6.I haven't had an easy past. I was in therapy for years, it didn't really change much. I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety and for a long time I wanted to die every day. I reached the end of what I was offered by the medical profession and decided it was time to find my own solutions. Since then I have changed my diet, started going to the gym every week, got a dog, started taking supplements, micro-dosed psilocybin (magic mushrooms) and practised mindfulness and meditation. I am a very different person today both mentally and physically.
7.I love making art, painting, sculpting and digital art. Digital is my current favourite, I like to make trippy pictures from the photos I take while I walk the dog in the woods. I have an album here if you are curious...well you got this far..
8.I make a lot of jokes and use a lot of sarcasm. Having a sense of humour gets me through the day and is ESSENTIAL for making it on this planet. If you look at life like it's a joke someone is playing on you then it's easier to let things slide. This quote from Bo Burnham sums it up nicely for me "Tragedy will be exclusively joked about..because my empathy is bumming me out. Goodbye sadness, hello jokes."
9.I form very deep connections with people but I am not one of those friends who wants to talk every day. In fact I may disappear for a month..maybe two, at a time. The only people who last with me are usually people who are the same in that respect. I'm lucky enough to have a few of those around me and I care for them very much.
10.I am in a long distance relationship. Past issues have made that a safer option for me at times. It's not easy, we've definitely had our ups and downs but stuck it out because we're important to each other. Being mentally and emotionally present in a relationship is absolutely key (no matter the distance), if you stop doing that then you will drift and once you drift too far it's almost impossible to save. I've made a lot of mistakes in relationships up to this point and I'm doing my best to avoid those same pitfalls this time around. Edit: we were important to each other until he decided to lie and make me feel like I couldn't trust my own gut feeling. And that, is the end of that.
2.I've always had a thirst for knowledge. Human behaviour, psychology, consciousness, biology...I just like to know how things work and why they work that way. Because I'm always taking in new information, I don't tend to stay stuck to ideas or ideologies for too long.
3.I used to be very firmly atheist but now I just don't know...simple as that. That does not mean that I am open to being indoctrinated as I am pretty sure that nobody knows for sure what it going on here. I've listened to ideas from all different directions and points in history and my conclusion has just been "hmm, interesting". It would be nice if people could stop killing each other over which idea is best.
4.If you made it through the last paragraph without taking it personally or being butthurt then we could probably be friends :) I love open mindedness, people who can listen to points of view without feeling the need to attack or force theirs on top. An idea is not part of you, there is no need to defend it like it's your first born. An idea can't be hurt just because someone disagrees with it.
5.I meditate every day. It took practise but now when I do it, it's like getting a hug. There is a lot to be said for clearing your mind, it creates space for useful ideas and answers to problems. A brain is like a stomach, put nothing but rubbish into it and it's not going to work well for you.
6.I haven't had an easy past. I was in therapy for years, it didn't really change much. I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety and for a long time I wanted to die every day. I reached the end of what I was offered by the medical profession and decided it was time to find my own solutions. Since then I have changed my diet, started going to the gym every week, got a dog, started taking supplements, micro-dosed psilocybin (magic mushrooms) and practised mindfulness and meditation. I am a very different person today both mentally and physically.
7.I love making art, painting, sculpting and digital art. Digital is my current favourite, I like to make trippy pictures from the photos I take while I walk the dog in the woods. I have an album here if you are curious...well you got this far..
8.I make a lot of jokes and use a lot of sarcasm. Having a sense of humour gets me through the day and is ESSENTIAL for making it on this planet. If you look at life like it's a joke someone is playing on you then it's easier to let things slide. This quote from Bo Burnham sums it up nicely for me "Tragedy will be exclusively joked about..because my empathy is bumming me out. Goodbye sadness, hello jokes."
9.I form very deep connections with people but I am not one of those friends who wants to talk every day. In fact I may disappear for a month..maybe two, at a time. The only people who last with me are usually people who are the same in that respect. I'm lucky enough to have a few of those around me and I care for them very much.
10.I am in a long distance relationship. Past issues have made that a safer option for me at times. It's not easy, we've definitely had our ups and downs but stuck it out because we're important to each other. Being mentally and emotionally present in a relationship is absolutely key (no matter the distance), if you stop doing that then you will drift and once you drift too far it's almost impossible to save. I've made a lot of mistakes in relationships up to this point and I'm doing my best to avoid those same pitfalls this time around. Edit: we were important to each other until he decided to lie and make me feel like I couldn't trust my own gut feeling. And that, is the end of that.
