to those who only grew up with one parent

My experience was…I felt like there was a lot that I was missing. No mom. No siblings. No friends really until high school but even then my time with them was very limited because of the protectiveness of my dad. And not only did he shelter me, but he simply wasn’t there emotionally or even verbally. It was a very quiet, lonely, unvalidated existence to have as you’re being shaped into the person you will become. Even to this day, I have this innate uncomfortability with females because I wasn’t exposed to many of them growing, and unfortunately one in particular abused me early on resulting in an even more darkened attitude towards them. It’s just hard to trust females. On the other hand, I naturally feel more comfortable with males because that kind of connection was the only one I knew. It was the only one that brought any kind of safety factor. But not having an outwardly affectionate father had me craving validation and acceptance from males, especially after he passed and I knew I could never get any of that from him. I’m extremely grateful to have had the life that I have had considering how easily it could’ve gone a much darker way, but living in the house I did influenced my mental health severely and it’s something that made my life and my journey to self-love way more difficult than it needed to be.

I didn't really know my dad until I was 16. Bad things happened when I saw him. My mom was very protective but still tried sometimes and he always broke her trust. My mom put me in the middle of a lot. They're both gone now and it's been 4/5 years. Once they are gone you're free.

Well I lost my mum at 16. But always had a closer bond to my mum but I was just still too young to understand the connection. I suppose daughters tend to get on with fathers sometimes better than mothers. My half sister went through something very similar to your story. I only found out I had a half sister a few years ago but found out she was fostered for most of her life and now has made contact with us and my dad and we are in a good connection.

Sorry you had a bad experience my mother was and still is my hero to this day

I never met my biological father and my mum isn't even 100% who is he. When I was a baby, my mum got into a poly relationship with four other people, and they all raised me as their own. I'm very lucky to have had them and the fact they helped raise a child who wasn't biologically theirs is just amazing. I love all three of my mums and both of my dads so much and they're huge inspirations to me

I'm so sorry. Hopefully you found the family you choose. Sometimes friends are better than family.

Shit basically! Have always just had my dad and I'm grateful for that. But not having a mother has impacted my life massively and sadly it always will.

My mother died when I was five. Dad had a lot of anxiety after that and had trouble with stable jobs for a long time after. When my mother and sister died he was working, frequently 12 and 14 hour days. He didn't find out until hours and hours after the accident because his workplace didn't even tell him that people were trying to reach him. It broke him pretty badly and he always had this fear something would happen to my brother and I if he wasn't around all the time. So we were relatively poor as he worked a bit and caught up with stuff and then stopped and fell behind again. He was there if we needed anything, but it was a lot of staying home and not doing anything most of the time.

Other people have had it far worse. I would be lying if I said there wasn't any trauma. But I've never been abused or anything like that.

Out of all my life’s issues, I feel lucky I never met my dad. I met my half siblings from him. They ended up in foster care because he was so terrible. I dodged a bullet when he abandoned me.

So she said he was abusive and cruel but she herself has been abusive and cruel to you maybe she was projecting making it look like you were better off with her than seeking out your dad 🥴

It was hell, but I turned out okei^^