I Used to Self Harm

I started at 10. I cut consistently until I was at least 22. I stopped for a while. But I've missed it. I'm almost 27. I started again. Just small, shallow cuts now. I guess it just makes me feel really stupid now. But not enough to make me want to stop. It's like a drug for me. And I know I'm too old to still be doing this. To still be struggling with this at all. But I am. And nothing satisfies like seeing myself bleed. I don't know. I probably deserve it anyway.

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ItsAir · 36-40, M

It's an odd urge to rid of, it's been a while for myself and I still want to. Maybe it's the pain and endorphins that come with it, maybe it's a physical way to express mental anguish. Maybe we think we deserve it. Wish I could say dont do it, but anyone one of us that do would be hypocrites telling the other not to.