I Need Help And Advice

People think I'm crazy but I don't think I am. Just because I love the idea of killing my friends,the earth exploding, and dying doesnt make me crazy. Just because I see demons and hear voices doeant mean I'm crazy. Just because positivity dissapoints me doesn't make mean I'm crazy. Sure, I have voices in my head telling me to kill everything but who cares? I am amused by death, but so what? I am not crazy,but what am I? I don't understand this