The Blameless Society (2021)
*My general observations. Long post but be willing to read to the end*
If we aren't there already we are headed in that direction like an out of control train on a blocked railway. At one time taking responsibility for your actions was a sign of decency and character. I don't think in this technology rich world that is the case anymore. Virtual finger pointing is the way to go. It's quick and easy and requires little critical thinking when a mad face or thumbs down emoji will do. Far to many aren't capable to handling differing thoughts and opinions. Society now is teaching that our actions are 110% linked to how someone treated us, and zero to do with taking responsibility for how we respond. Tough situations in our life have caused us harm, and we may choose negative behavior as a means of unconscious expression. How long though do we use other people as a means to keep ourselves locked into negative patterns? How long does it take us to accept blame when WE are wrong, instead of spending more time desperately searching for a person and/or situation to direct our blame at?
“I can't trust people so I have a right to be angry and raging and spout off at everyone.”
“I was cheated on once so now I am jealous and suspicious of my partner and their actions. If I feel insecure it's their fault, regardless of how good they are to me.”
“When I get drunk and high it's because I am in great pain. So if I lie and steal from you, and then berate you for not getting me out of one crises or another it's YOUR fault. You didn't stop me from getting in pain in the first place.
“I'm extremely overweight because of an endocrine problem, not because I eat to much and live a sedentary lifestyle, plus I eat to much because I have emotional pain which someone else caused.”
“I feel a lot of sadness, so instead of doing something I will go on about it incessantly online (and offline) and wait for people to give me attention, and if in any they suggest that I was somehow partially to blame for my pain my offense will be great. They have NO right to question me when I feel sad.”
People will say that these are genuine reasons for a persons behavior and no one can argue that there aren't exceptions in these scenarios. Everyone carries emotional scars. Lots of people also wear their scars as a crown (and perhaps without understanding they do) as a way to escape taking responsibility for their lives. It's a scary place to openly and unashamedly look at yourself. Terrifying actually, but knowing yourself in an out is better, and accepting your wrongs and flaws makes a better person. Despite having vast knowledge at our fingertips, the articles are having more to do with deflecting blame instead of taking responsibility. Not entirely sure what this phenomenon is, but I do know it's not going to grow a moral or ethical future. Our truth in this is that people CAN learn from their bad choices, accept their blame and decide what is better. This is what should be promoted, and one can only hope we circle back around to symbols of strength instead of banners of victim-hood.
-Raven
If we aren't there already we are headed in that direction like an out of control train on a blocked railway. At one time taking responsibility for your actions was a sign of decency and character. I don't think in this technology rich world that is the case anymore. Virtual finger pointing is the way to go. It's quick and easy and requires little critical thinking when a mad face or thumbs down emoji will do. Far to many aren't capable to handling differing thoughts and opinions. Society now is teaching that our actions are 110% linked to how someone treated us, and zero to do with taking responsibility for how we respond. Tough situations in our life have caused us harm, and we may choose negative behavior as a means of unconscious expression. How long though do we use other people as a means to keep ourselves locked into negative patterns? How long does it take us to accept blame when WE are wrong, instead of spending more time desperately searching for a person and/or situation to direct our blame at?
“I can't trust people so I have a right to be angry and raging and spout off at everyone.”
“I was cheated on once so now I am jealous and suspicious of my partner and their actions. If I feel insecure it's their fault, regardless of how good they are to me.”
“When I get drunk and high it's because I am in great pain. So if I lie and steal from you, and then berate you for not getting me out of one crises or another it's YOUR fault. You didn't stop me from getting in pain in the first place.
“I'm extremely overweight because of an endocrine problem, not because I eat to much and live a sedentary lifestyle, plus I eat to much because I have emotional pain which someone else caused.”
“I feel a lot of sadness, so instead of doing something I will go on about it incessantly online (and offline) and wait for people to give me attention, and if in any they suggest that I was somehow partially to blame for my pain my offense will be great. They have NO right to question me when I feel sad.”
People will say that these are genuine reasons for a persons behavior and no one can argue that there aren't exceptions in these scenarios. Everyone carries emotional scars. Lots of people also wear their scars as a crown (and perhaps without understanding they do) as a way to escape taking responsibility for their lives. It's a scary place to openly and unashamedly look at yourself. Terrifying actually, but knowing yourself in an out is better, and accepting your wrongs and flaws makes a better person. Despite having vast knowledge at our fingertips, the articles are having more to do with deflecting blame instead of taking responsibility. Not entirely sure what this phenomenon is, but I do know it's not going to grow a moral or ethical future. Our truth in this is that people CAN learn from their bad choices, accept their blame and decide what is better. This is what should be promoted, and one can only hope we circle back around to symbols of strength instead of banners of victim-hood.
-Raven
51-55, F
