Do good men exists?

Most of my experiences with men were bad. Most men seem egoistic type who come in my life who tend to abuse, betray , put me down or be emotionally unavailable. Do any other women have, good experiences with men who treat them good? Sometimes all my experiences make me question the existance of good men, sometimes i feel are all men pretending and men only want to suppress, feel superior, control or use women.

Maybe i am bad at judging men or choosing men who are bad and good. Idk what i am doing wrong

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bijouxbroussard · F

Absolutely good men exist, and women are finding them.
Sometimes it’s a question of really getting to know the person, not moving too fast, and not ignoring red flags that indicate that he’s not the right person.

sahi81 · 22-25, F

@bijouxbroussard i think good men don't come in women's life like bad ones. We women have to look for them and see men for who they are ( not for what we want) and not overlook or make excuses for their bad behaviours. Good might be picky unlike bad ones.

bijouxbroussard · F

@sahi81 My experience has been that good men often come into women’s lives, but women dismiss them because they don’t initially see them as romantic prospects. My cousin recently married her accountant (she’s a pensioner, not wealthy, he’s doing quite well). A neighbor here married our postman.

sahi81 · 22-25, F

@bijouxbroussard maybe bad men appear more confident or create a fantasy. Good ones take time and only do it when committed or when dating? not from first itself? bad ones can't respect women's boundaries

bijouxbroussard · F

@sahi81 That is true, men who view dating as a game do come off as more confident and appear to be more persistent. Some women also say they have a weakness for "bad guys", but the smart ones grow out of that, it rarely ends well.

Mamapolo2016 · F

@bijouxbroussard I am reminded of a line from “Funny Girl” where Fanny’s mother says of Nicky Arnstein, played by the suave, debonair Omar Sharif,

“When someone is strange, they should ACT a little strange.”

So often, both women and men have a tendency to accept an instant relationship. In that process they frequently ignore (I know I did) danger signs.

Patience and experience are the best way to assess someone as a good partner or a bad one.

And we should all remember that “being in a good relationship” means different things to different people.

Finding out if he/she will be a good partner for YOU takes time.

bijouxbroussard · F

@Mamapolo2016 Yes. 😊

sahi81 · 22-25, F

@Mamapolo2016 i been with men for m 1 -2 years, just to find out after again 1 year ( total after 3 years) that their intentions and they were bad from start. I think it's more about being good at judging men and not making excuses for their bad behaviours, and seeing people for who they are without getting blinded by our desires, emotions, fantasies, hopes, etc. To judge anyone and see their background, reputation, both good and bad and everything which takes time, i think 3-6 months is enough if we don't let our emotions cloud judgement. I think women have to be more logical about which type men are compatible with them

Mamapolo2016 · F

@sahi81 Don’t buy the hype, honey. The initial stage of relationships is about sexual desire and crushing on someone. You may fall in love and then realize you don’t want this person because of their behavior.

Or it may grow into a calmer, more secure, but still desirable long-term love that will last.

“Marry in haste, regret it at your leisure,”