I would like to find a partner to share life with.. to support each other. To fall deeply into listening each other..

But I quit looking at guys, I seriously did. I am decided that I'm not going to go into anything that doesn't feel like 100% yes never again.
You know this feeling of incompatibility, that there's something off. The following thought that "none's perfect and I won't find a perfect match". Lies! If I've felt that before it's completely possible that I can meet with it again.
No more semi-half-stuff.
Ah I'll find him. For reasons it took me sometime to admit to myself that I do want a partner. I couldn't accept that I don't want to just be by myself forever ♾️ ha!

Top | Newest First | Oldest First

scooogy · 31-35, MVIP

I have such a similar issue with a young woman at college who looks quite like my first girlfriend. Ever since during a drinking game she looked me in the eyes with a smile I fell in love with 20 years ago, I tend to mention her to others with the name of my first girlfriend. Once at a campfire with her and some other friends when I sat beside her and saw a slight smile on her lips when she looked mesmerized into the fire, I had to keep myself from putting my arm around her, warming her up a bit. I happened to compliment her on her looks, and despite alcohol she indeed realized.

But now I keep telling myself that I shouldn't ask her out on a date just because she reminds me of a past love of mine. Though thinking this through, I'm tempted to make up for all that missed opportunities with the woman of 20 years ago...

elafina · 36-40, F

@scooogy I can understand you. It can be tough to see clearly. But in the end, just allow yourself to be happy and do your best 💓

scooogy · 31-35, MVIP

@elafina I overheard her tell a friend of mine that she's open for anything right now, but this was after she told him as well how devastated she felt after quitting with her last boyfriend which she struggled with for quite a while. I keep telling myself that even though I have that urge of being romantic with this woman, I wonder how that should benefit her. I would rather take care of her needs, like taking care of eating enough and also healthy, but on the other hand this is something she could take care of by herself. But I guess she just doesn't really on her own. Being dependent on someone who takes care of her seems wrong though.

elafina · 36-40, F

@scooogy that is so sweet of you. I hope it will work out the most beneficial way for both of you.

Sojournersoul · M

He will show up on your door step at the right time. He will be very lucky

View 1 more replies »

Sojournersoul · M

@elafina you deserve the best soulmate.

elafina · 36-40, F

@Sojournersoul maybe it'll be a dog 🐕🐺?

Sojournersoul · M

@elafina it might be. They make the best company

ninalanyon · 61-69, T

I hope you find the right one before it's too late to enjoy.

elafina · 36-40, F

@ninalanyon hahaha okay you just sounded like my mom now 🤣

ninalanyon · 61-69, T

@elafina Probably. But probably not with quite the same motives. She is probably pining for grandchildren as well as thinking of your happiness. I just want to suggest that you don't search endlessly for the perfect man when you could have a good life with one who is merely very good. And of course your mother has a point if you want to have children, you can't put it off for ever.

Of course you [i]probably[/i] shouldn't let your mother pressure you, and you [i]absolutely[/i] must not let random people on the internet do it!

elafina · 36-40, F

@ninalanyon I don't want kids in this lifetime...
And when I say that I will wait until I find the one that my heart will say Yes, I mean it. One who "is merely very good" means instantly that my thinking got into the equation. I want to pick with my heart again, after years and years.. anyways I am definitely in no rush.
Wanting someone for me doesn't mean that if I don't find him, I'll spend a life in misery. I've lots to occupy me. If someone comes along, it'll definitely be a great thing, but it's not a prerequisite. So there is no hurry really for me here..