On mortality
Last evening..
I'm sitting out on the deck looking across the garden to the rear wall of tall cedars. It's a warm, late afternoon with a gentle breeze stirring the branches. Sometimes the trees at either end of the row sway in opposite directions making it seem as though the solid mass of greenery is actually breathing. The warm yellow sunlight makes the foliage appear to glow and I"m filled with a feeling of calm, peaceful satisfaction. After a while I start to reflect on my own mortality and the small amount of time that must now be left to me. The thought comes that maybe the best possible death would be right here, right now. The comforting warmth, the pleasant view slowly blurring and fading away: What would top that?
I actually tried (not very hard) to will myself to slowly fade away right there & then, in my comfy chair. It didn't happen but I sure felt a delicious calm. Oh boy, if I could just go out on that note ! .....
I'm sitting out on the deck looking across the garden to the rear wall of tall cedars. It's a warm, late afternoon with a gentle breeze stirring the branches. Sometimes the trees at either end of the row sway in opposite directions making it seem as though the solid mass of greenery is actually breathing. The warm yellow sunlight makes the foliage appear to glow and I"m filled with a feeling of calm, peaceful satisfaction. After a while I start to reflect on my own mortality and the small amount of time that must now be left to me. The thought comes that maybe the best possible death would be right here, right now. The comforting warmth, the pleasant view slowly blurring and fading away: What would top that?
I actually tried (not very hard) to will myself to slowly fade away right there & then, in my comfy chair. It didn't happen but I sure felt a delicious calm. Oh boy, if I could just go out on that note ! .....
