Top | Newest First | Oldest First
benfaltiger004 · 46-50, M
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@benfaltiger004 thank you 🫂
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
I want to but can't resolve the pain, life can be like this sometimes :(.
But I can send you a big virtual hug and tell you "It's going to be ok, I know it... and I know you know it too.".
You said you want someone to love you - that someone starts with you. You could be "missing yourself". Love yourself better on a daily basis. Make it a mission to include some special things or routines to you every day... that make you feel nice.
The most alone feeling is not exactly being alone. It is when one forgot how they can shine inside out (indefinitely). Contrary to societal norms and expectations, your inner flame won't just waver on its own. If you tell yourself that your reservoir of light is eternal, that is how it will feel. When you think your heart is almost empty, you must remember that oh wait... my love and hope inside does not have such a thing as an "end"! Then, you will be more giving to all and you will also receive more from life. Will some use/hurt you? No one knows, maybe. But that's on them. Don't rob yourself from the chance to connect with many extraordinary people at the expense of a few that just didn't know better.
Go out more often. Find something that makes you feel alive. Keep doing that!
Give yourself some alone time too - sometimes you might actually need the peace to really think calmly and relax.
But also, remember to always give yourself venues to make new friends.
There is always a way to have meaningful connections.
A smile goes a really, really long way. One of the most beautiful things, especially when it is real. Please find a way to find yours again. You know how.. better than me.
Every time I respond to a post I pray for that person to feel better in my heart. That is genuine and makes me feel that maybe, when I wish for that, it can somehow reach the person too. The world has its shadows. But shadows underline the light. The darker the shadow, the brighter the adjacent light. If you see dark... you might be the light 🌞
But I can send you a big virtual hug and tell you "It's going to be ok, I know it... and I know you know it too.".
You said you want someone to love you - that someone starts with you. You could be "missing yourself". Love yourself better on a daily basis. Make it a mission to include some special things or routines to you every day... that make you feel nice.
The most alone feeling is not exactly being alone. It is when one forgot how they can shine inside out (indefinitely). Contrary to societal norms and expectations, your inner flame won't just waver on its own. If you tell yourself that your reservoir of light is eternal, that is how it will feel. When you think your heart is almost empty, you must remember that oh wait... my love and hope inside does not have such a thing as an "end"! Then, you will be more giving to all and you will also receive more from life. Will some use/hurt you? No one knows, maybe. But that's on them. Don't rob yourself from the chance to connect with many extraordinary people at the expense of a few that just didn't know better.
Go out more often. Find something that makes you feel alive. Keep doing that!
Give yourself some alone time too - sometimes you might actually need the peace to really think calmly and relax.
But also, remember to always give yourself venues to make new friends.
There is always a way to have meaningful connections.
A smile goes a really, really long way. One of the most beautiful things, especially when it is real. Please find a way to find yours again. You know how.. better than me.
Every time I respond to a post I pray for that person to feel better in my heart. That is genuine and makes me feel that maybe, when I wish for that, it can somehow reach the person too. The world has its shadows. But shadows underline the light. The darker the shadow, the brighter the adjacent light. If you see dark... you might be the light 🌞
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@Busybee333 thank you so much for your kind and wise words. And for your prayers.
HumanEarth · 56-60, F
View 2 more replies »
Busybee333 · 31-35, F
@Lilliesandlight Work on yourself first. Can't control others, but you can control yourself to heal better emotionally and to solve the things that make you sad. Although you can't command change in others, you can express how you feel. Deeply.
Talk to him. Somewhere alone - a calm place, no distractions. Just you and him. No rush. Speak your heart calmly. Explain all the things that make you cry. Keep the tone down and try to not be accusatory but rather introspective. Some people just can't take critique easily (they want to be perfect and when you point out something that can make them better, they get all defensive... you don't want that, you want his heart open and attentive in that moment.)
If you don't know how to begin you can start with, I know I don't tell you this often enough, but I love you very very much, you know that, right? Do you still love me too?
I try to love you the best I can but... I may have not noticed, my mind being always occupied with "what we have to do/solve.. did I do something that hurt you? (he could tell you why he gets angry - anger is often sadness in disguise). If he critiques, take it in and say thank you for explaining to me, I will try to be more understanding.
But some people respond with what are you talking about, it's all good (out of uneasiness).
You can follow by - Sometimes I feel unloved and it hurts me. I thought maybe I did something that makes you always mad sad indifferent ( you name it). and It makes me feel so alone... but I still love you, as day 1 and even more. I need to know because if I feel this way... you might be feeling it too. I do want us to revive our love. I want you to remember that I love you and I also want to feel loved but among all the challenges we went through, I feel that we have grown apart because we don't give enough attention to that love, still alive between us. It scares me that it may fade if we don't do anything.
Something in the lines of, I want us to have a better marriage life. Please tell me how you think we can make it better and I will tell you how I think we can make it better. Let's work on that.
*Also plan out tracking your marriage goals and readjusting your "marriage strengthening" strategies as you go.
It sounds so technical and I knw it is hard... but given that your love for each other is still strong... a renaissance is totally possible and I wish you that! :)
---------------------------------------
On the other hand, if you both feel that your love is gone (or one does but one doesn't)... and especially if you feel threatened or in danger in [i]any[/i] way... divorce might be in fact, better.
If you can't fix it, accept it as is or walk away to give both of you the time to have another chance for something that [i]will[/i] work. But don't skip the "attempt fix part". Just don't get lost in it - keep records of what is better and what is not and have timed "where is all this going" talks every moth or so to know if things are really better or the same. during these talks "blame" is unaccepted. You have to think that you are one team solving everything and not two separate entities at war. If you can do that, you can solve everything. Best of luck for your marriage to get back on its feet. But if it doesn't, you will still do just fine because you always give your best in everything - you must remember that.
Stay strong and beautiful :)
Talk to him. Somewhere alone - a calm place, no distractions. Just you and him. No rush. Speak your heart calmly. Explain all the things that make you cry. Keep the tone down and try to not be accusatory but rather introspective. Some people just can't take critique easily (they want to be perfect and when you point out something that can make them better, they get all defensive... you don't want that, you want his heart open and attentive in that moment.)
If you don't know how to begin you can start with, I know I don't tell you this often enough, but I love you very very much, you know that, right? Do you still love me too?
I try to love you the best I can but... I may have not noticed, my mind being always occupied with "what we have to do/solve.. did I do something that hurt you? (he could tell you why he gets angry - anger is often sadness in disguise). If he critiques, take it in and say thank you for explaining to me, I will try to be more understanding.
But some people respond with what are you talking about, it's all good (out of uneasiness).
You can follow by - Sometimes I feel unloved and it hurts me. I thought maybe I did something that makes you always mad sad indifferent ( you name it). and It makes me feel so alone... but I still love you, as day 1 and even more. I need to know because if I feel this way... you might be feeling it too. I do want us to revive our love. I want you to remember that I love you and I also want to feel loved but among all the challenges we went through, I feel that we have grown apart because we don't give enough attention to that love, still alive between us. It scares me that it may fade if we don't do anything.
Something in the lines of, I want us to have a better marriage life. Please tell me how you think we can make it better and I will tell you how I think we can make it better. Let's work on that.
*Also plan out tracking your marriage goals and readjusting your "marriage strengthening" strategies as you go.
It sounds so technical and I knw it is hard... but given that your love for each other is still strong... a renaissance is totally possible and I wish you that! :)
---------------------------------------
On the other hand, if you both feel that your love is gone (or one does but one doesn't)... and especially if you feel threatened or in danger in [i]any[/i] way... divorce might be in fact, better.
If you can't fix it, accept it as is or walk away to give both of you the time to have another chance for something that [i]will[/i] work. But don't skip the "attempt fix part". Just don't get lost in it - keep records of what is better and what is not and have timed "where is all this going" talks every moth or so to know if things are really better or the same. during these talks "blame" is unaccepted. You have to think that you are one team solving everything and not two separate entities at war. If you can do that, you can solve everything. Best of luck for your marriage to get back on its feet. But if it doesn't, you will still do just fine because you always give your best in everything - you must remember that.
Stay strong and beautiful :)
HumanEarth · 56-60, F
@Busybee333 That was a nice thing you wrote. She needs a friend like you
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@Busybee333 thank you for you kind advice
akindheart · 61-69, F
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@akindheart wise words
thewindupbirdchronicles · 46-50, M
eventtemple123 · 22-25, M
Happymedium · 56-60, F
Manneeds ·
What are you exactly looking for in a person to have ?? People really need to learn how to respond to their messages and not ignore them !
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@Manneeds who is ignoring you?
Docdon23 · M
Wish i could come help you. Hugs are very therapeutic. Release feelgood chemicals. Wish i could help. Sending virtual hugs at least.
Noworries72 · 51-55, M
Tall order. I know one Person.
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@Noworries72 and whose that
Bipolarbear71 · 51-55, M
take a number 😏 mines 224-810-4469 😂
anoderod55 · 61-69, M
Nice warm hug 🤗 ❤️ 🌹
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@anoderod55 thank you
anoderod55 · 61-69, M
@Lilliesandlight You are welcome 🌻 🦋
MichaelT · 36-40, M
I wish I could
ABCDEF7 · M
Elanor · F
I wish that for you, Hope is eternal 🌹
This comment is hidden.
Show Comment
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@jshm2 I've actually thought of that. But i don't want to get my ass kicked