Not Completely

[i][c=004A59]No not completely but were almost there.... Their is a age gap so that doesn't help matters.... There is fifteen years between us.... We been together fourteen years....90% of the time we go without sex... We've had sex maybe five times this year.... He bouught some happy pills to help but he rarely takes them.... Sometimes its really frustrating... Sex use to be so hot between us now it seems like its just another chore for him.... I'm 43 not dead yet.... Before you ask I have tried almost everything short of bringing someone else in for a threesome.... I know he loves me still things have got in a serious rut and stayed there... I still have needs... [/c][/i]

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pdqsailor1 · 61-69, M

BIG ouch... I don't think he can place blame on his age for a lack of sexual appetite...Why do I say this? We have been married for 33 years.. I am 65..she is 60... when I was under fifty my Wife was enjoying herself to the point that she decided that we would make love once each day, every day.. we still do and we both very much look forward to it.. Back then when she had decided that this was how it was going to be I had some major reservations.. I had no idea if I could keep "UP" to her schedule and I also worried if it was going to get stale or boring and that we might loose interest.. my concerns were misplaced on both counts I could perform to her expectations AND it has never become stale or boring..

I would suggest that to build harmony in your home that you try for a modest schedule... Literally once a week - marked on the calendar, no arguments - for us this worked quite well... Then we renegotiated a few months into this... to twice a week... and it was even better.. Then we tried three times a week and when it got to every other day... the schedule was tossed and she decided she was in charge.. and I went along with it..

Reliable sexual performance is like any other form of exercise and regular and frequent sex makes for reliable physical performance..

justanotherone · 51-55, M

It's not the missing act. It's being unwanted. That is messing up the brain.

Restlessmama · 41-45, F

@justanotherone thats true

HootyTheNightOwl

5 times in a year isn't the worst... some of us go years without anything.

Restlessmama · 41-45, F

@HootyTheNightOwl yeah guess its just hard feeling rejected no matter how long you go without it

HootyTheNightOwl

@Restlessmama I agree... I used to feel the same way until I checked out emotionally after I started seeing red flags.

Now I'm at the point where I expect nothing anymore and I desperately want to get out, but the abuse and my fear of the police has me feeling trapped since I can't even take a bag of my clothes and stuff with me.

Soon to be ex just rips it out of my hands - which hurts my back before I even get out of the door. There's almost 3kg of coins in there that I've collected over the last three years.

I now have a suitcase on wheels to transfer everything into... but I am never alone for long enough to do that and get far enough away to not fear being found and bought back here.

Restlessmama · 41-45, F

@HootyTheNightOwl Wow that is horrible.... Wish i had some words to make things better but i know words do nothing! I really hope you find your way out.... I cant imagine how scared you must be...

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