Questions of the day

Hrm.

- Either history or good communication. You can't make a new friend if you don't talk to them, but you can keep old ones by having a history together. It means including this person into your life and vice versa, to at lesat some part. You don't need a million super close friends and they don't either.

- I reach out, invite them to things if they're in-person, check in on their wellbeing if they've indicated publicly they are not well, etc.

- I also reach out more than once and see if they're interested in making friends or wanna keep things distant.

- They close off conversations, refuse invites repeatedly, and show you defensive/rude behaviour over small stuff.

That said everyone behaves in certain ways and people may desperately want to be friends and display "leave me alone" behaviour as a defence mechanism. You gotta feel things out.

Being a friend means mutual care and respect. It means we can laugh but also share serious matters too, support each other and show up when we can. But also respect each other's boundaries and not take too much.

If I want to be someone's friend I will listen and show I care in little ways. I like to give a little gift to show people they mean more to me than just an acquaintance. Something I made for them to express that I see them.

I will back off quickly if I can tell someone doesn't care for me. I give a little shot, respect the time it takes to build and let it go if there's no reciprocation. Not many people care for me though so I can feel distance very clearly.

It means being there, and to me, it means being excited/happy/content to be in their presence, truly feel relaxed in their presence (no alcohol required lol)

Text them, call them, make time to see them, ask them questions and be genuinely interested in the answers, want to tell them about me

Makes zero effort in getting to know me, keeps things on the surface level, basically fake

Quiet behind the scenes type of support and help