How do you stop being immature?
I just hit 27 and I've never felt like an adult. It feels like I have to work so hard to "act" mature, work hard and seem professional, do chores, cook food, do taxes and other paperwork and at some points even have kids. I just want to give up, not work, not do chores, move back to my parents and live like I used to as a kid. Mentally I feel like I'm still the small kid who never grew up. How to deal with this? Every day feels like a challenge, but especially Sundays. During the weekend I can relax, watch cartoons and play games, go out for walks or buy clothes. But then I have to put my adult mask on for Monday, which takes so much energy. It feels like my whole life is a lie, pretending to be someone who I am not. I'm already putting on the minimum effort to work efficiently and keep myself alive, but it's draining my energy. I'm afraid I will never grow up and be strong, because I have an amazing boyfriend who is both mature and understanding and it's unfair for him. Because of my mood swings and lazy periods, he has taken to do most of the chores. This makes me feel even worse, even though he tells it's okay to rest and I can help him when I feel better. I just want to be a better girlfriend and more mature and strong woman naturally. How do people do that? I think on the outside, at times I can think about how I should think from the other person's perspective. But for some reason, I'm like a total child on the inside. Even though I don't act like a total child outside, I'm really excited on the inside. I get obsessive over things like I keep overthinking everything as if it's uncontrollable. I have like a burst of emotions, but on the outside, I try to look composed and serious. The thing is like the little child I am in my mind, I kinda wish I could act like child. I kinda wish I could be pampered. I wish I could tease someone. I wish I could complain to someone. I wish I could overreact/fangirl to someone. But I know I should be mature. How do I change my mindset? By being responsible. Certain life changing responsibilities have a way of opening ones eyes to what's most important in life. Innate childishness in it of itself isn't a crutch as long as you have your personal responsibilities in check. And remember, no one's perfect, sometimes it is tough and hard and life gives you ugly outcomes no matter what you do. It's the act of never quiting said responsibilities that proves if you're mature or childish. Not inconsequential personalty traits imho
How do I stop acting childish?
I get angry easily, I'm stubborn, and I throw tantrums. My mom tells me that if I want to be treated like an adult I need to start acting like one, but no matter how hard I try I can't control my emotions. How can I act like an adult and stop acting immature? Hi. I'm turning 19 soon, and recently I've developed the habit of opening an incognito window and consuming content intended for children. I'd say the age range for most of this is about 8-11, and all of it is similar to things I watched as a child. So, as the title says, is there anything wrong with this?
I’m still immature emotionally
I’ve been doing some self-reflecting on how I’ve been screwing up my life lately and I’ve realized that though I am mature in a lot of ways...I am still immature emotionally or lacking emotional intelligence. I feel kind of happy that I even realize/acknowledge this, now I’m wondering besides trying to keep it in mind is there anything else I can do to ensure I grow into a stable and mature man? Do you all think maturity is intentionally practiced or is it more organic in your opinion? I feel kind of silly even asking this lol. No joke, keeping things from your childhood keeps you in that mindset. Giving away or binning your childhood toys and such can help you break away from that child you once where, like starting your new life as an adult.
Take yourself seriously. Look at yourself like you are someone you care about and want to succeed. Confront your negative emotions. If you are male, be a man. If you are female, be a woman. Do something difficult and do it consistently. Make something ugly beautiful and maintain it. What immature behavior screams, “I’m desperately trying to be seen as an adult!” ?
What to do about a childish and emotionally unstable friend?(22F)
I hope this is the correct place to post this,I’m in a bit of a pickle.I am 22 years old,as is my friend.I think she’s very childish.I feel bad,but I’m at my limit
About her; she attends university,no job(PLENTY of free time-we will get to this later),lives with her parents and wants to be an animator.Her interests are a little...childish to be honest. She likes cartoons,kpop, and dolls.Theres nothing wrong with that,of course.I even like those things myself.However,it seems to be all she is into.She doesn’t listen to much other music or watch anything live action(with a few exceptions).Its a bit strange.She doesn’t have much friends outside our circle of 4,and has never had a relationship or even kissed anybody.
It is not just her interests that are childish,but her emotions and actions.Her lack of social awareness is concerning.She doesn’t seem to realize when she is irritating people or that they’re uncomfortable/uninterested in what she’s talking about.Many times she will repeat a topic several times,or keep talking about a subject, even though out friend group is visibility uninterested.Another example was New Year’s Eve- we celebrated at her home with a bonfire,and she danced and sang kpop songs in front of her younger brothers girlfriend.
The main concern,however,is her emotional intelligence.She reacts like a teenage girl and is quick to cry at the slightest bit of conflict or criticism. For example; while she drove me home today, she vented to me yet again about how she failed a course and failed to submit a late assignment-even after I warned her in advance when grades were due.My friends and I already tried to comfort her and give her advice.But we are drained,as the rest of us are currently dealing with family problems.Not to mention,I work and attend school full time as well. Even with the flu,I completed my assignments and passed.
As she ranted on,I finally snapped.I told her she had time to practice dancing to kpop songs,but didn’t complete her assignments and that she needs to be responsible. She responded by yelling at me, “ I KNOW IM A FUCKING IDIOT”.Which is her go to response to any sort of criticism.This isn’t a one time thing-it’s just how she is.
It makes me worried that she’s an adult who wants to enter the animation field,yet can’t be responsible or take criticism without throwing a tantrum. I’ve been dealing with this for quite some time now,and as bad as I feel,I don’t know if I should continue our friend ship.Her immaturity is even pushing our new friend away from her- I can’t always be there to help her or defend her.Ive already tried to get her to get mental help(she takes anxiety medication and attends counseling) but her mindset does not go away.What should I do?
What unacceptable/childish behaviour have you witnessed in another adult recently? I'll start
Tonight at dinner, my 21 year old sister stamped on my foot so hard its now swollen and bruised. She did this because I attempted to hand money to my husband and she wanted it so she could play the poker machines. Instead of asking for it like a normal adult, this was her immediate reaction. She then grabbed the money out of my hand mid transfer and walked off.
Good old comparison always makes me question things
We were sitting on the couch playing a certain Pirate type X-Box game today as it was raining out and work got called off. After a couple hours we lost a crew member and a new one joined. Was an annoying as fuck 12 year old kid that would not shut up. He was the only one that had a mic on in the crew and no matter how many times the crew leader told him to be quiet and stop talking, he just would not shut up. Was rambling about this and that and at one point was just humming and squealing into his mic. When he finally left I said to my partner "thank god some piece and quiet finally" and he told me "to grow up and stop being childish, that I'm almost 40 and I shouldn't be annoyed so much by kids."
I honestly couldn't believe that he said that. He too was getting visibly annoyed at this kid not being able to keep his mouth closed for more than 3 seconds.
Anyhoo, rant over, thanks for reading. Wow this blew up, I wasn't expecting this many replies when I woke up this morning. Thank you everyone for your comments. He had been playing for a few hours and there was a ton of loot on the ship and he wanted to cash out but the crew leader wanted to keep doing quests so he had to tolerate it till they finally decided to cash out. Otherwise he would have just left and found another crew. So he was pretty annoyed as well and it was getting late and we were both tired. And to top things off in annoyance land our dog has broken a toenail and wont let anyone near it to fix it so he has been constantly licking it for 2 days now. Now that is guaranteed to sour the mood of anyone. Lick lick lick lick lick. And no taking to the vet is pointless, he wont let them touch him at all. I'm keeping an eye on it and if it looks like its getting infected or anything I will take him for some antibiotics.
For the people saying he's a fence sitter, he's not, if anything he's the "get off my dang lawn" type. He gets so cranky when anyone goes on his lawn. He even considered moving out mailbox right to the roadside so the postman doesn't ride his bike over our lawn. haha
I (26f) when I look at people my age, seem so much 'adultier' than I do. I think this has a lot to do with my ADHD but other people my age with kids seem more "grown up" to me. I don't know if this is purely based on them having kids as we both have jobs, houses, cars, responsibilities and other commitments but I feel.. I don't know, less mature
I know many people never "really" feel like an adult and feel like they're just acting out a role, but every now and then I get this strong wave of nostalgia above and beyond the usual "fake it 'till you make it" symptoms. I live independently and can take care of myself. But some part of me just doesn't understand why I'm not still living in my parents' house, going to my old elementary school, and playing Sonic the Hedgehog after school with the kids down the street. What happened? When did I turn into a grownup, and why doesn't life have a rewind button?
My hobbies generally include tv, going to the gym, doing crafty things like sewing, makeup and recently I've taken up roller blading. Often parents make snide comments about my hobbies but I enjoy them.
So, I was always known to be the cheerful friend of the group, trying to get everyone to smile. Recently, people started telling me to "lower it down a little" when I talk to them. I figured I was being too loud or maybe I accidentally brought up a topic someone hates, so I kept quiet. But whenever they joked about my issues I was supposed to laugh and was called dumb and sensitive if I talked to them about it, sometimes I was even called an attention seeker. So should I relax anyways or should I just laugh at my own lame jokes and be happy with myself? Advice?
Maybe it's because I have more fun and stress less but I'm curious if others feel the same way.
Edit - I did speak to my sister about this and made sure that she was 100% aware that her actions were unacceptable and incredibly childish. She refused to apologise, but I can't force her to change her ways.
Anyone think you act really childish, personality-wise?
I just turned 20 a few months ago and I don't feel like an adult. Yeah I know I have responsibilities and for the most part, I take care of them. I just sometimes feel I'm still a child.
In terms of my personality, I act really childish around people I'm comfortable with; family and some friends. Do you think you will ever grow out of it? I am a 21 yo female. I am struggling because of how immaturely I handle some personal problems. When I have a dispute with my friend (who is very special), I always think I am right and he is wrong at the beginning. I get angry and I handle the situation very poorly. This behavior leads to us fighting needlessly for hours. This fights always ends with me accepting that I was wrong and I was childish. No matter what I do, I can't break this pattern. I realized that I understand his intention wrong all the time. He trusts me and he loves me. But when he says something that I find weird or out of place, I doubt him. This is not lack of trust, this is an insecurity. I am an immature, insecure and selfish person and I want out. So my question is, how do you stop being like that? How do you handle relationship problems? I've been dating my current boyfriend for a month and a half. I'm 27, I had some previous relationships (got married to a guy, we broke up 2 years ago), and let's just say I've had the opportunity to experience quite some stuff in my life. My boyfriend is 24, but he isn't even used to go out on weekends, and he had never gone to parties and such until last year. I'm his first boyfriend, but he's been with other men before. We met through grindr, and after some dates we decided to enter the relationship. The problem is that the honeymoon period of the relationship is over, and now I see more and more that he's very childish. He acts almost like a teenager most times. The sex with him is awesome, but other than that he doesn't have much to say. We hardly ever have a meaningful conversation, most times we only talk about who we think is hot, or some random stuff. He's kinda gothy, and it seems he thinks he's very different from other people because of that. Sometimes he does things I consider really dumb, like posting a video on Instagram of him spitting fake blood from his mouth (ooh so scary...). When we go out with my friends he spends most of the time silent, and many times he doesn't get the jokes because he doesn't have the references to understand it. I like him very much, but I'm starting to question whether this relationship is worthy for me and for him. So, my questions are: how do I talk about this with him? Should I try to make him "grow up"? Should I end the relationship once and for all? Thanks in advance for the advice. Let me just add some points that may be important. We see each other only on weekends - he lives in another city, and he comes to my place on Friday afternoon and leaves on Sunday afternoon. The part about talking with him that worries me is that he seems to be very into the relationship, and I fear he'll try to change completely because of whatever I say. So, I turn 24 in just a few days and all these years I've always been in love with games, even to the point that I have an associates degree in Game Design(Unfortunately, no job in the field, only making small games in my free time) Video games have been my entire life and so getting and playing new games that I want is kind of just what I do. My 4yr old son is also in love with watching me play new games so it's a win win situation. Now, the new Saints Row game had just recently come out and it's really all that I want, (despite the bad reviews I've seen). Unfortunately, no one can get me anything for my birthday, which simply means no game for me. Anyway, is it childish that all I wanted was a new game instead of something else that most people would prefer?
How do I stop acting childish?
I get angry easily, I'm stubborn, and I throw tantrums. My mom tells me that if I want to be treated like an adult I need to start acting like one, but no matter how hard I try I can't control my emotions. How can I act like an adult and stop acting immature? Hi. I'm turning 19 soon, and recently I've developed the habit of opening an incognito window and consuming content intended for children. I'd say the age range for most of this is about 8-11, and all of it is similar to things I watched as a child. So, as the title says, is there anything wrong with this?
I’m still immature emotionally
I’ve been doing some self-reflecting on how I’ve been screwing up my life lately and I’ve realized that though I am mature in a lot of ways...I am still immature emotionally or lacking emotional intelligence. I feel kind of happy that I even realize/acknowledge this, now I’m wondering besides trying to keep it in mind is there anything else I can do to ensure I grow into a stable and mature man? Do you all think maturity is intentionally practiced or is it more organic in your opinion? I feel kind of silly even asking this lol. No joke, keeping things from your childhood keeps you in that mindset. Giving away or binning your childhood toys and such can help you break away from that child you once where, like starting your new life as an adult.
Take yourself seriously. Look at yourself like you are someone you care about and want to succeed. Confront your negative emotions. If you are male, be a man. If you are female, be a woman. Do something difficult and do it consistently. Make something ugly beautiful and maintain it. What immature behavior screams, “I’m desperately trying to be seen as an adult!” ?
What to do about a childish and emotionally unstable friend?(22F)
I hope this is the correct place to post this,I’m in a bit of a pickle.I am 22 years old,as is my friend.I think she’s very childish.I feel bad,but I’m at my limit
About her; she attends university,no job(PLENTY of free time-we will get to this later),lives with her parents and wants to be an animator.Her interests are a little...childish to be honest. She likes cartoons,kpop, and dolls.Theres nothing wrong with that,of course.I even like those things myself.However,it seems to be all she is into.She doesn’t listen to much other music or watch anything live action(with a few exceptions).Its a bit strange.She doesn’t have much friends outside our circle of 4,and has never had a relationship or even kissed anybody.
It is not just her interests that are childish,but her emotions and actions.Her lack of social awareness is concerning.She doesn’t seem to realize when she is irritating people or that they’re uncomfortable/uninterested in what she’s talking about.Many times she will repeat a topic several times,or keep talking about a subject, even though out friend group is visibility uninterested.Another example was New Year’s Eve- we celebrated at her home with a bonfire,and she danced and sang kpop songs in front of her younger brothers girlfriend.
The main concern,however,is her emotional intelligence.She reacts like a teenage girl and is quick to cry at the slightest bit of conflict or criticism. For example; while she drove me home today, she vented to me yet again about how she failed a course and failed to submit a late assignment-even after I warned her in advance when grades were due.My friends and I already tried to comfort her and give her advice.But we are drained,as the rest of us are currently dealing with family problems.Not to mention,I work and attend school full time as well. Even with the flu,I completed my assignments and passed.
As she ranted on,I finally snapped.I told her she had time to practice dancing to kpop songs,but didn’t complete her assignments and that she needs to be responsible. She responded by yelling at me, “ I KNOW IM A FUCKING IDIOT”.Which is her go to response to any sort of criticism.This isn’t a one time thing-it’s just how she is.
It makes me worried that she’s an adult who wants to enter the animation field,yet can’t be responsible or take criticism without throwing a tantrum. I’ve been dealing with this for quite some time now,and as bad as I feel,I don’t know if I should continue our friend ship.Her immaturity is even pushing our new friend away from her- I can’t always be there to help her or defend her.Ive already tried to get her to get mental help(she takes anxiety medication and attends counseling) but her mindset does not go away.What should I do?
What unacceptable/childish behaviour have you witnessed in another adult recently? I'll start
Tonight at dinner, my 21 year old sister stamped on my foot so hard its now swollen and bruised. She did this because I attempted to hand money to my husband and she wanted it so she could play the poker machines. Instead of asking for it like a normal adult, this was her immediate reaction. She then grabbed the money out of my hand mid transfer and walked off.
Good old comparison always makes me question things
We were sitting on the couch playing a certain Pirate type X-Box game today as it was raining out and work got called off. After a couple hours we lost a crew member and a new one joined. Was an annoying as fuck 12 year old kid that would not shut up. He was the only one that had a mic on in the crew and no matter how many times the crew leader told him to be quiet and stop talking, he just would not shut up. Was rambling about this and that and at one point was just humming and squealing into his mic. When he finally left I said to my partner "thank god some piece and quiet finally" and he told me "to grow up and stop being childish, that I'm almost 40 and I shouldn't be annoyed so much by kids."
I honestly couldn't believe that he said that. He too was getting visibly annoyed at this kid not being able to keep his mouth closed for more than 3 seconds.
Anyhoo, rant over, thanks for reading. Wow this blew up, I wasn't expecting this many replies when I woke up this morning. Thank you everyone for your comments. He had been playing for a few hours and there was a ton of loot on the ship and he wanted to cash out but the crew leader wanted to keep doing quests so he had to tolerate it till they finally decided to cash out. Otherwise he would have just left and found another crew. So he was pretty annoyed as well and it was getting late and we were both tired. And to top things off in annoyance land our dog has broken a toenail and wont let anyone near it to fix it so he has been constantly licking it for 2 days now. Now that is guaranteed to sour the mood of anyone. Lick lick lick lick lick. And no taking to the vet is pointless, he wont let them touch him at all. I'm keeping an eye on it and if it looks like its getting infected or anything I will take him for some antibiotics.
For the people saying he's a fence sitter, he's not, if anything he's the "get off my dang lawn" type. He gets so cranky when anyone goes on his lawn. He even considered moving out mailbox right to the roadside so the postman doesn't ride his bike over our lawn. haha
I (26f) when I look at people my age, seem so much 'adultier' than I do. I think this has a lot to do with my ADHD but other people my age with kids seem more "grown up" to me. I don't know if this is purely based on them having kids as we both have jobs, houses, cars, responsibilities and other commitments but I feel.. I don't know, less mature
I know many people never "really" feel like an adult and feel like they're just acting out a role, but every now and then I get this strong wave of nostalgia above and beyond the usual "fake it 'till you make it" symptoms. I live independently and can take care of myself. But some part of me just doesn't understand why I'm not still living in my parents' house, going to my old elementary school, and playing Sonic the Hedgehog after school with the kids down the street. What happened? When did I turn into a grownup, and why doesn't life have a rewind button?
My hobbies generally include tv, going to the gym, doing crafty things like sewing, makeup and recently I've taken up roller blading. Often parents make snide comments about my hobbies but I enjoy them.
So, I was always known to be the cheerful friend of the group, trying to get everyone to smile. Recently, people started telling me to "lower it down a little" when I talk to them. I figured I was being too loud or maybe I accidentally brought up a topic someone hates, so I kept quiet. But whenever they joked about my issues I was supposed to laugh and was called dumb and sensitive if I talked to them about it, sometimes I was even called an attention seeker. So should I relax anyways or should I just laugh at my own lame jokes and be happy with myself? Advice?
Maybe it's because I have more fun and stress less but I'm curious if others feel the same way.
Edit - I did speak to my sister about this and made sure that she was 100% aware that her actions were unacceptable and incredibly childish. She refused to apologise, but I can't force her to change her ways.
Anyone think you act really childish, personality-wise?
I just turned 20 a few months ago and I don't feel like an adult. Yeah I know I have responsibilities and for the most part, I take care of them. I just sometimes feel I'm still a child.
In terms of my personality, I act really childish around people I'm comfortable with; family and some friends. Do you think you will ever grow out of it? I am a 21 yo female. I am struggling because of how immaturely I handle some personal problems. When I have a dispute with my friend (who is very special), I always think I am right and he is wrong at the beginning. I get angry and I handle the situation very poorly. This behavior leads to us fighting needlessly for hours. This fights always ends with me accepting that I was wrong and I was childish. No matter what I do, I can't break this pattern. I realized that I understand his intention wrong all the time. He trusts me and he loves me. But when he says something that I find weird or out of place, I doubt him. This is not lack of trust, this is an insecurity. I am an immature, insecure and selfish person and I want out. So my question is, how do you stop being like that? How do you handle relationship problems? I've been dating my current boyfriend for a month and a half. I'm 27, I had some previous relationships (got married to a guy, we broke up 2 years ago), and let's just say I've had the opportunity to experience quite some stuff in my life. My boyfriend is 24, but he isn't even used to go out on weekends, and he had never gone to parties and such until last year. I'm his first boyfriend, but he's been with other men before. We met through grindr, and after some dates we decided to enter the relationship. The problem is that the honeymoon period of the relationship is over, and now I see more and more that he's very childish. He acts almost like a teenager most times. The sex with him is awesome, but other than that he doesn't have much to say. We hardly ever have a meaningful conversation, most times we only talk about who we think is hot, or some random stuff. He's kinda gothy, and it seems he thinks he's very different from other people because of that. Sometimes he does things I consider really dumb, like posting a video on Instagram of him spitting fake blood from his mouth (ooh so scary...). When we go out with my friends he spends most of the time silent, and many times he doesn't get the jokes because he doesn't have the references to understand it. I like him very much, but I'm starting to question whether this relationship is worthy for me and for him. So, my questions are: how do I talk about this with him? Should I try to make him "grow up"? Should I end the relationship once and for all? Thanks in advance for the advice. Let me just add some points that may be important. We see each other only on weekends - he lives in another city, and he comes to my place on Friday afternoon and leaves on Sunday afternoon. The part about talking with him that worries me is that he seems to be very into the relationship, and I fear he'll try to change completely because of whatever I say. So, I turn 24 in just a few days and all these years I've always been in love with games, even to the point that I have an associates degree in Game Design(Unfortunately, no job in the field, only making small games in my free time) Video games have been my entire life and so getting and playing new games that I want is kind of just what I do. My 4yr old son is also in love with watching me play new games so it's a win win situation. Now, the new Saints Row game had just recently come out and it's really all that I want, (despite the bad reviews I've seen). Unfortunately, no one can get me anything for my birthday, which simply means no game for me. Anyway, is it childish that all I wanted was a new game instead of something else that most people would prefer?
