I Am Married

I know it'll probably sounds ridiculous, but I hate the pedestal my husband puts me upon. Don't get me wrong, I do appreciate the care and love he shows me, but I think he goes too far.

He gives in to me constantly and won't defend his position on matters. It's like the man has nothing he's passionate about, nothing he's willing to defend. It's always "happy wife, happy life", and that drives me crazy.

It feels like he's lost his personality, there's nothing intriguing or interesting about him when he's constantly so accommodating and accepting.

He refuses to quarrel with me, usually giving in to what I want, even if I can tell he doesn't agree. He says he does these things because he doesn't want to make me mad.

I'm sure that some will probably read this and think "So what's the problem?".

The problem I seem to have is the man I married now lacks substance. The individual, the man, I fell in love with is gone, and I'm left a person who is devoid of anything intriguing or interesting.

I have tried to talk to him about this, but I can't seem to make him understand. He thinks he's the same as he's ever been, but he's not. Not at all.

He's not "himself", or at least, he's not the man I couldn't stay away from all those years ago. Now he seems like a "yes" man without any backbone.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

aaaabbbb

The reality is that is avoiding conflict at home, not sure if you're home maker or also have a 2nd job outside. There is enough bulshit a man has to deal with outside at work, vwry few are either willing to tolerate that at home we need peace, not sure what he does for living and how his work conditions are.

Instead of fighting he decided to choose the other options. In all honesty, had he choosen the other option you would not habe been happy either as then you would have complained about him being too demanding and arguing about everything...it is ZERO or ONE (black or white), it is rare to find 0.5 or grey, for most men.

I saw this through out college and work life. Women who went after guys who were outgoing, adventrous and partying most being divorced for two reasons as work and family life started with 5 and 10 yrs people changed and same women complained about him being either couch potato not doing enough to help or being passive.

And same goes for men, a man would say i married this sassy, full of energy or passive girl and after kids or as time as gone by she has changed and I don't even recognize a person who she is.

This is called growing apart as some grow together and some grow apart.