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Konicha605 · 22-25, F
not being completely open to your partner. i mean, why do people in marriages have sex with other people? for many reasons, but these reasons come from issues like "i don't love him/her anymore" or "i felt attracted to this man/woman, so i was caught by the moment and it happened". those are symptoms of an unhealthy marriage. if u don't talk about that to your partner, then you are already cheating even before actually doing it, but if you talk about that to your partner and they don't do anything about that or they don't care, then it's more your partner's fault. I think marriage, but in general every relationship, is about balance: you do something for me, i do something for you. if this balance doesn't exist, then there's something wrong
greenmountaingal · 70-79, F
@Konicha605 People cheat for many reasons. Some of those reasons have nothing to do with their marriage or how they relate to their partner. In some cultures, it's considered normal for a man to cheat (some Italians think it's a sign of health and success in life for a man to have a mistress). Some men get bored with being married to one woman. Some people like the adventure aspect of sneaking around. To say it's about the quality of the marital relationship just puts the burden of guilt on the person who is cheated on and makes them feel even worse, plus it gives the cheater the perfect excuse.
bijouxbroussard · F
@greenmountaingal Agreed, especially the assumption that the cheated on spouse is somehow being “neglectful”. Men, particularly will justify cheating to the other woman by telling her he and his wife stopped having sex long ago. An acquaintance who was the other woman found out the hard way when both she [b]and[/b] the wife of the man she was convinced was just waiting for the “right time” to file for divorce became pregnant. It took a minute for her to grasp that [b]no[/b], the wife hadn’t also been cheating. 🤦🏽♀️