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Can’t shake worrying about what other people think. Advice?

I’ll try to keep it short ..early on in my career I had people who were so so unkind to me. I worked for a couple of places who despite being young, these 2 places just had terrible culture. I moved on. Learned better ways to deal with crazy people at least on a face to face level. And I’ve moved on to bigger and better things. Truly. I’ve worked for some really cool tech companies since then.. and have totally overcome that time in my life. Started my own company, had kids and a successful marriage. Things are better now, people are respectful usually towards me. I recently changed jobs and made sure on LinkedIn not to notify my network, all fine and good until oddly enough all these people from my past are starting to view my profile. People who were really mean to me, and not just 1 but 4 very specific who were unkind to me in the past from those jobs early in my career. people all in a matter of the past week have taken an interest to view my profile online. It has my head spinning.. like how and why do they care? On top of it I feel like I get non constructive criticism from so many angles my husband (who doesn’t mean to) but others like my sister, friends etc... and I could list some very real examples.. it’s all opinionated like “why are you like this, why do you do that” very much rooted in jealousy.. I have a lot to brag about but I don’t.. people come swinging at my tree often. How do I find a way to not worry about what these people think? It haunts me at night,. I think about it all the time.. I’m considering starting counseling .. anyone have any similar experiences or advice? Please be kind. I’m a good person, who cares about others and is often too kind.. I used to let people walk all over me but don’t any more.. I just walk away now.. at least time has taught me that. Thanks!
I read an interesting article in Psychology Today a while back relating to this topic I thought I might share here. To summarize, it said that a lot of people are disproportionately concerned about what other people think about them.

But when asked in surveys, personal interviews as well and anecdotally what they're thinking mostly about or what their thoughts gravitate to from moment to moment almost all of them replied "I think mostly about myself." Very little if any time is spent thinking about others.

So in reality, to be concerned about or worry what others think about you is basically wasting a lot of your time. They're [i]not [/i]thinking about you. They're busy thinking about [i]themselves[/i]. So I had an epiphany, I no longer care - I don't have to. Who cares what others think about you - they're not.
Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F
I’ve seen similar articles. It’s so comforting and I hope that is true, thanks for sharing that. BUT what’s triggered me to feel people must care lately is seeing that people from my past are viewing my profile (it shows when they do on LinkedIn) obviously they care enough to remember me from 5-8 years ago. I’m not even friends with them And they’ve gone out of their way to find me on social media. It makes me think they must care in some capacity even a small one. So disturbing. @DudeistPriest
Carazaa · F
God bless you!
Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F
Thank you you too!@Carazaa
Anon88 · 31-35, M
I wish I could help you. I'm in the same boat. It causes a lot of anxiety.

 
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