Do you think true love exists?
All throughout my life I have seen nothing but heartbreak, divorce, separation, and today I saw the worst, one of my idols has separated from his wife. Is love just a lie? Does true love exist?
I use to believe in true love. And now I don't. I believe that love has conditions. And its more of a contractual agreement betweeen 2 or more people. There are definitely terms and conditions. And if one person does not fulfill their obligation than the contract gets annulled. I just think that our world is so very shallow. And definitely void of soft skills. At least not in large quantities. Also there are so many distractions. The world wide web has made it difficult for people to compete. People can literally watch any media, listen to music, play games, chat, video chat, get "stimulated" on line. Nothing is out of its reach. This claim seems very bizarre but it is something that I have been thinking of quite a bit lately as I heal from too many failed relationships. This isn’t going to be some pessimistic broken hearted sob story but a collection of reasons why I believe that true love doesn’t exist. Remember this is subjective, I wouldn’t want people getting triggered and offended over my current thoughts and beliefs. Out of all of my relationships, they always start with that initial physical attraction. Which to me, isn’t love or anything meaningful. I don’t believe that is love, but only infatuation and or lust. But then you start to “fall” for that person and you both say that you “love” each other. But what does that actually mean? Do we really “love” that person, or do we love how they make us feel? It makes me question if Love is actually real or it’s just a fleeting feeling. And how do we know that they love the true us? And not some idea of who they made us to be? It gets me thinking if people actually love each other, or just what they do for each other. I just don’t know how someone could really love our true 100% soul. Like we are limited by looks, external everything, even voice.. And all we can express is such a limited part of our true identity. I don’t know this just gets me thinking how real is love. Or do we just love “love” itself. Or is Love just attention, or affection, or small acts dedicated to one another? This particularly makes me question Love when I see people grieving the loss of their loved ones. Example being my grandma’s funeral. I noticed everyone’s speeches were about how our grandma made them feel, and all the things she did for them. But it wasn’t ever really about our grandma, it was about her role in their lives. Seeing people grieve has always seemed somewhat selfish to me. Because that person is finally free, but we are crying about how they aren’t in our life anymore. I don’t mean for this so sound negative or hurtful. I am just trying to get to the root of what Love actually is. And what qualifies for us to be loved. Interesting that this is where I am at. I’ll find my own resolution soon. Can you convince me true love does indeed exist? What I mean by "True Love" is such that there is that one special person out there for someone they are meant to be with for the rest of their available life. I have come to the decision for myself it doesn't exist because of human nature..even people that constantly say I Love You to their SO cheat on them, and that certainly does not ring of "True Love." Then, I think businesses and people that profit from love have made it so unrealistic that people as a whole have lost sight of what love truly was and it has respectively lost all meaning in todays world.
I used to believe in love, I no longer do. I am to the point where it is all about compatibility and nothing else, with the divorce and infidelity rate today-how can it possibly exist? Personally for me, it all comes down to who can you stand to be around more than anyone else and the benefits you can both mutually reap.
I believe there's more than one True Love out there for each of us. We live our lives hoping to meet one of them. Maybe there's two, maybe there's twenty, maybe fifty. The way you know you've met them? When even though you know that you could probably connect that way with someone else (out of the billions of people in the world), you don't want to. You're perfectly content with the person you're with. Mind you, it doesn't mean this person or this relationship is perfect. It means it's perfect for you. It still definitely needs work, like any other relationship.
My True Love was dropped on this Earth six years before me, on the other side of the world. By all laws of probability, we were never supposed to meet, our paths were never supposed to cross. And yet we're discussing our wedding. Even if another, fully compatible, person currently lives down the street from me, I don't want them. I found one and one is all it takes.
It's easy to fall in love with somebody, but choosing to love somebody for a lifetime isn't that easy. It's a commitment. TV shows cut when people have a problem. Whether they cut to the end of the fight or just one gesture a person makes to get over it is beside the point. They take out all of the struggle. So most of us, either via TV or friends exposed to TV, have seemed to have lost the concept that love isn't just a feeling. It's a choice. It's choosing to love and look after somebody. Even when you're mad at them. Even on a day when you may not particularly like them. It's choosing to do something nice after you think they did something bad that started a fight. We don't get to skip the gritty part. But true love doesn't just happen. It's something you have to work for and build with somebody.
Like soul mates? Nah, there's noway out of the billions of people on earth I happened to find my "one" working in the same 24 hour garage in the same town. I settled, he settled and we all have to decide wether we want to settle at some point.
I believe there is. I’ve seen my parents’ marriage grow stronger every day of my life. And I’ve seen my brother go through a gauntlet of terrible girlfriends for a solid decade before he found his now fiancée. Immediately when I met her I knew that she’d be different, that she’d be the one for my brother. He had a few decent girlfriends throughout the years, but none I could say with as much certainty that they’d be the one for him. True love isn’t something quantifiable, but you definitely know it when you see it.
"True love" is a fabricated plot point utilized by media to condense the full complexity of human relationships into a two hour movie. As it's portrayed in popular culture, it reflects lust or infatuation more than it ever resembles "love." There is no such thing as true love. I feel like "love" is more complicated. Its a series of decisions and sacrifices made to stick with someone. Mostly because they continue to provide more benefit than they take in cost. After all we're hard wired to engage in reproduction. Our motivations are always motivated towards that goal, "love" is just the story we tell ourselves.
Does true love exist? What does it look like after children?
I could ask this question on a dozen different subreddits but I wanted to get the opinion of all the moms out there. Do you guys think you’re still in love? When you had a new baby, were you able to appreciate that love? What happens when there’s so much baggage between you amongst the many years of marriage that it just feels like an effort to keep the marriage afloat? If true love really does exist, and say you find it. That one person that’s meant for you. What does that look like in different stages of your life. I know a lot of people say love is a choice you make every day but, what if it’s so HARD to choose it?
I sometimes don't believe in the idea of true love. It just seems... so incompatible with the idea that leagues exist. People say love is blind but that's far from the truth. This is why true love doesn't exist.
Does true love actually exist, or do we all just settle for what our circumstances and environment allow?
I think a lot of people have closeted preferences where they either want to date a very attractive, wealthy, and/or successful person. It's just that these people are a rarity and they will probably be swarmed with people interested in them so the average person knows better than to spend a lot of time chasing these people even if they fantasise about being with them. It's like an opportunity cost problem. Love is a lot like Santa Claus. It's something you want to believe in because it's in your best interests to do so. Other people talk about it like it's real. Dating is like the school yard bullies that make fun of you and beat you soundly until you run home crying. Then you settle for the most you can get for the least amount of crap you have to put up with.
Do my fellow infps believe in the so called one true love? Personally I found it hard to find one true meaningful connection with someone. I don’t know if it has to do with my never ending sense of longing for a deep connection in our partner. Mundane talks just cannot hold long for me. At some point I’m feeling kind of hopeless and afraid that I won’t be able to find my soulmate. Why have you given up on finding true love?
True love: a strong and lasting affection beyond mere attraction between spouses or lovers who are in a happy, passionate and fulfilling relationship.
Also: would you differentiate between true love and the philosophy of soul-mates?
I use to believe in true love. And now I don't. I believe that love has conditions. And its more of a contractual agreement betweeen 2 or more people. There are definitely terms and conditions. And if one person does not fulfill their obligation than the contract gets annulled. I just think that our world is so very shallow. And definitely void of soft skills. At least not in large quantities. Also there are so many distractions. The world wide web has made it difficult for people to compete. People can literally watch any media, listen to music, play games, chat, video chat, get "stimulated" on line. Nothing is out of its reach. This claim seems very bizarre but it is something that I have been thinking of quite a bit lately as I heal from too many failed relationships. This isn’t going to be some pessimistic broken hearted sob story but a collection of reasons why I believe that true love doesn’t exist. Remember this is subjective, I wouldn’t want people getting triggered and offended over my current thoughts and beliefs. Out of all of my relationships, they always start with that initial physical attraction. Which to me, isn’t love or anything meaningful. I don’t believe that is love, but only infatuation and or lust. But then you start to “fall” for that person and you both say that you “love” each other. But what does that actually mean? Do we really “love” that person, or do we love how they make us feel? It makes me question if Love is actually real or it’s just a fleeting feeling. And how do we know that they love the true us? And not some idea of who they made us to be? It gets me thinking if people actually love each other, or just what they do for each other. I just don’t know how someone could really love our true 100% soul. Like we are limited by looks, external everything, even voice.. And all we can express is such a limited part of our true identity. I don’t know this just gets me thinking how real is love. Or do we just love “love” itself. Or is Love just attention, or affection, or small acts dedicated to one another? This particularly makes me question Love when I see people grieving the loss of their loved ones. Example being my grandma’s funeral. I noticed everyone’s speeches were about how our grandma made them feel, and all the things she did for them. But it wasn’t ever really about our grandma, it was about her role in their lives. Seeing people grieve has always seemed somewhat selfish to me. Because that person is finally free, but we are crying about how they aren’t in our life anymore. I don’t mean for this so sound negative or hurtful. I am just trying to get to the root of what Love actually is. And what qualifies for us to be loved. Interesting that this is where I am at. I’ll find my own resolution soon. Can you convince me true love does indeed exist? What I mean by "True Love" is such that there is that one special person out there for someone they are meant to be with for the rest of their available life. I have come to the decision for myself it doesn't exist because of human nature..even people that constantly say I Love You to their SO cheat on them, and that certainly does not ring of "True Love." Then, I think businesses and people that profit from love have made it so unrealistic that people as a whole have lost sight of what love truly was and it has respectively lost all meaning in todays world.
I used to believe in love, I no longer do. I am to the point where it is all about compatibility and nothing else, with the divorce and infidelity rate today-how can it possibly exist? Personally for me, it all comes down to who can you stand to be around more than anyone else and the benefits you can both mutually reap.
I believe there's more than one True Love out there for each of us. We live our lives hoping to meet one of them. Maybe there's two, maybe there's twenty, maybe fifty. The way you know you've met them? When even though you know that you could probably connect that way with someone else (out of the billions of people in the world), you don't want to. You're perfectly content with the person you're with. Mind you, it doesn't mean this person or this relationship is perfect. It means it's perfect for you. It still definitely needs work, like any other relationship.
My True Love was dropped on this Earth six years before me, on the other side of the world. By all laws of probability, we were never supposed to meet, our paths were never supposed to cross. And yet we're discussing our wedding. Even if another, fully compatible, person currently lives down the street from me, I don't want them. I found one and one is all it takes.
It's easy to fall in love with somebody, but choosing to love somebody for a lifetime isn't that easy. It's a commitment. TV shows cut when people have a problem. Whether they cut to the end of the fight or just one gesture a person makes to get over it is beside the point. They take out all of the struggle. So most of us, either via TV or friends exposed to TV, have seemed to have lost the concept that love isn't just a feeling. It's a choice. It's choosing to love and look after somebody. Even when you're mad at them. Even on a day when you may not particularly like them. It's choosing to do something nice after you think they did something bad that started a fight. We don't get to skip the gritty part. But true love doesn't just happen. It's something you have to work for and build with somebody.
Like soul mates? Nah, there's noway out of the billions of people on earth I happened to find my "one" working in the same 24 hour garage in the same town. I settled, he settled and we all have to decide wether we want to settle at some point.
I believe there is. I’ve seen my parents’ marriage grow stronger every day of my life. And I’ve seen my brother go through a gauntlet of terrible girlfriends for a solid decade before he found his now fiancée. Immediately when I met her I knew that she’d be different, that she’d be the one for my brother. He had a few decent girlfriends throughout the years, but none I could say with as much certainty that they’d be the one for him. True love isn’t something quantifiable, but you definitely know it when you see it.
"True love" is a fabricated plot point utilized by media to condense the full complexity of human relationships into a two hour movie. As it's portrayed in popular culture, it reflects lust or infatuation more than it ever resembles "love." There is no such thing as true love. I feel like "love" is more complicated. Its a series of decisions and sacrifices made to stick with someone. Mostly because they continue to provide more benefit than they take in cost. After all we're hard wired to engage in reproduction. Our motivations are always motivated towards that goal, "love" is just the story we tell ourselves.
Does true love exist? What does it look like after children?
I could ask this question on a dozen different subreddits but I wanted to get the opinion of all the moms out there. Do you guys think you’re still in love? When you had a new baby, were you able to appreciate that love? What happens when there’s so much baggage between you amongst the many years of marriage that it just feels like an effort to keep the marriage afloat? If true love really does exist, and say you find it. That one person that’s meant for you. What does that look like in different stages of your life. I know a lot of people say love is a choice you make every day but, what if it’s so HARD to choose it?
I sometimes don't believe in the idea of true love. It just seems... so incompatible with the idea that leagues exist. People say love is blind but that's far from the truth. This is why true love doesn't exist.
Does true love actually exist, or do we all just settle for what our circumstances and environment allow?
I think a lot of people have closeted preferences where they either want to date a very attractive, wealthy, and/or successful person. It's just that these people are a rarity and they will probably be swarmed with people interested in them so the average person knows better than to spend a lot of time chasing these people even if they fantasise about being with them. It's like an opportunity cost problem. Love is a lot like Santa Claus. It's something you want to believe in because it's in your best interests to do so. Other people talk about it like it's real. Dating is like the school yard bullies that make fun of you and beat you soundly until you run home crying. Then you settle for the most you can get for the least amount of crap you have to put up with.
Do my fellow infps believe in the so called one true love? Personally I found it hard to find one true meaningful connection with someone. I don’t know if it has to do with my never ending sense of longing for a deep connection in our partner. Mundane talks just cannot hold long for me. At some point I’m feeling kind of hopeless and afraid that I won’t be able to find my soulmate. Why have you given up on finding true love?
True love: a strong and lasting affection beyond mere attraction between spouses or lovers who are in a happy, passionate and fulfilling relationship.
Also: would you differentiate between true love and the philosophy of soul-mates?
