A man who's very monogamous, faithful and loving still exist?

I am don't that but it is difficult if the other person won't live with you, is gone a lot, and won't get married. What am I doing! I work but feel like I'm wasting my life being stuck there so that I can have some kind of rudimentary health care and money, I live alone in this tiny house. It's all very nice I'm sure and I'm quite thankful but I feel enslaved and chained in many directions.